"What" is mindfulness and "how" do I use it?
Observing, describing, and participating.
What are the "what" skills of mindfulness?
This is when you put a name to observed feelings, thoughts, or actions
What is labeling what you observed?
OR
What is Describing?
The first and most important interpersonal skill
What is clarifying your goals?
These skills cannot be done at the same time.
What are the "what" skills of mindfulness?
How you observe your body sensations.
What are your 5 senses?
The key question for this effectiveness skill is "What specific result or change do I want from this interaction?"
What is objectives effectiveness?
When you make a judgment about whether something fits within a category or not.
What is discriminate?
OR
What is discern?
You can observe the world within yourself by sensing these.
What are your thoughts, emotions, and body sensations?
The key question for this effectiveness skill is ‘How do I want the other person to feel about me after the interaction is over (whether or not I get the results or changes I want)?'
What is relationship effectiveness?
A judgement that is based on personal values or opinions.
What is an evaluation?
This is how you revise the statement "You think I'm an idiot" to be a description of an observation.
What is "I keep thinking you think I'm an idiot?"
The key question for this effectiveness skill is ‘How do I want to feel about myself after the interaction is over (whether or not I get the results or changes I want)?'
What is self-respect effectiveness?
You are acting this way when you are mindful of your goals in the situation and do what is necessary to achieve them.
What is effectively?
This is a formula for describing your personal reactions to what others say or do.
What is "when you do/say X, I think/feel Y?"
In addition to having an ability, to have a skill you must be able to do these two things.
What are observe the effect and modify what you do based on the feedback?