Mindfulness
What are the three states of mind according to DBT?
Reasonable mind, emotion mind, and wise mind.
What are the wise mind ACCEPTS skills for distracting?
Activities, contributing, comparisons, emotions, pushing away, thoughts, and sensations.
What are the goals of emotion regulation?
Understand and name one's own emotions, decrease frequency of unwanted emotions, decrease emotional vulnerability, and decrease emotional suffering.
What are the goals of interpersonal effectiveness?
Be skillfull in getting what you want from others, build relationships and end destructive ones, and walk the middle path.
I am practicing mindfulness skills of nonjudgmentally and participate, and my partner is inviting me to places I am not comfortable going to. Am I violating these skills by not going?
Discuss... Should include a discussion as to the limits of mindfulness skills and how being uncomfortable is a feeling one can be aware of rather than a determination for action.
What are the three mindfulness "What" skills? They involve how the three ways one engages in mindfulness.
Observe, describe, and participate
Give five different sensory examples of self-soothing activities.
Vision, hearing, smell, taste, touch.
Why do I have emotions? What do they do for me?
Emotions motivate us for action, communicate to others, and communicate to ourselves.
What gets in the way of practicing interpersonal effectiveness?
Not knowing what I want, my emotions get in the way, forget long-term goals for short-term goals, other people get in the way, and thoughts and beliefs get in the way.
When I get really overwhelmed I just want to use. I tried some of the distress tolerance skills like distracting and self-soothing, but they just aren't working. I don't know why my life is like this. What should I do?
Perseverance. There are a nearly limitless number of ways distress tolerance skills can be utilized. But they must be practiced continually, in combination with other skills.
"Long is the way and hard, that out of Hell leads up to the Light" - John Milton, Paradise Lost
What are the three mindfulness "How" skills? I.e., what three things should one keep in mind when engaging in mindfulness?
Nonjudgmentally, one-mindfully, and effectively.
What is mindfulness of current thoughts? How do I do it?
Mindfulness of current thoughts is to observe thoughts, adopt a curious mind, remember you are not your thoughts, and not trying to block, suppress, or cling to thoughts.
How do I build positive emotions in the short and long term?
Short term: Build positive experiences NOW, be mindful of positive experiences, and unmindful of negative ones.
Long term:Identify goals and values and work towards them. SMART.
What do the acronyms GIVE and FAST stand for? When do I use them?
Gentle, interested, validate, and easy manner. For use in building relationships with others.
be Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, and be Truthful. For use in maintaining a healthy relationship with yourself.
I feel a way and I do something. Someone hit me so I hit them back. I want to use, I made a safe time to use, so I use. Now I'm in jail. This isn't right.
It's my life, I know my emotions, why would I not listen to them? Isn't it that the system is busted and not me?
You are not your emotions. Your emotions are not infallible. They are just pieces of information.
There is a difference between rationalizing and defending your emotions and radically accepting that the place you live in does not allow for certain actions. Often times, we use rationalizations to harden us against change. This is often not helpful.
Why would I be mindful?
Mindfulness can reduce suffering, increase happiness, increase control of your mind, and experience reality as it is.
What is radical acceptance? Why would I do it?
Complete, total acceptance of a situation in mind, body, and heart. It is done because it is more effective than not to do it.
What are all the types of emotions I can experience according to DBT? (Hint, there are 9)
Anger, Disgust, Fear, Happiness, Jealousy, Love, Sadness, Shame, and Guilt
What is DEAR MAN? When do I use it?
Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce. Mindful, Appear confident, and Negotiate. Use it all the time, my friends.
Is this it? I'm doing all the skills, I'm working so hard, I've done so much to change and I've changed so much! But, I still feel... bored. Empty. I want to be excited. I want to have fun. I want to have purpose. I thought skills were supposed to make my life great, why isn't my life more than this?
Skills are not to make life a wonderland, though they may for some, skills are to create a life more worth living than the life before. There is suffering in life. There is pain and sadness in life. Some religions and philosophies propose a point wherein this is no longer the case, but none of us are there yet. Radical acceptance returns.
My life is in ashes right now. Every day is more terrible than the last. Why would I want to be more mindful of this pain?
A complex discussion...
I've radically accepted my desire to use. I continue to use and my life isn't quite going how I want it to. How do I radically accept my new life?
Radical acceptance is not approval, compassion, love, passivity, or against change. It is accepting reality as it is while still striving towards our goals and values. This is not radical acceptance, it is simply giving in to one's urges.
What is opposite action? Why would I do it? Why would it work?
It's when I change the emotion by acting opposite to my urge. I use it when I want to change my emotion because I don't feel it fits the situation. It works because my mind and body are intertwined.
My friend has stopped inviting me to events ever since we disagreed about something political. I really miss seeing my friend, but I don't know how to express this. What's something I could say to them to help bring our relationship back? (Hint: DEAR MAN)
Describe
Express
Assert
Reinforce
What is it to master skills? What does a person who has mastered all of these skills look like?
A simple human being. To try, to learn, and to try again is the mark of the master.
"The Tao (the way) that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao.
The name that can be named is not the eternal name."
- Tao Te Ching, Lao Tzu