Mindfulness
It is most effective to make decisions in this state of mind?
What is Wise mind
Being willing to Give to Get.
What is What is "N" Negotiate of DEAR MAN?
With words and actions show that you understand the other person's feelings and thoughts about the situation.
What is Validate?
This module, interpersonal effectiveness, is to help improve what type of skills.
What are communication skills.
This is important to me; I make decisions with these in mind.
What are your values.
BONUS: what is the "S" of FAST?
Another word for noticing.
What is observe?
A Script that enables you to be assertive, honest and direct in your communication.
What is DEAR MAN.
Bonus: give us a DEAR MAN script example.
The "I" in GIVE.
What is (Act) Interested?
Bonus: describe how you can Act Interested.
The IE skill used when we are trying to obtain an objective HOWEVER Relationship Effectiveness is most important.
What is GIVE?
No saying "I'm sorry"; looking ashamed, feeling bad for having an opinion or disagreeing.
What is (no) Apologies?
Bonus: Demonstrate asking for a raise with no apologies.
Put words on the experience.
What is describe?
Bonus: Describe how you are feeling right now.
Tell the person about your Feelings and Opinions about the situation.
What is Express, the "E" of DEAR MAN?
Bonus: Express your feelings about not receiving a return call that your said you were going to receive.
Be nice and respectful; no attacks, no threats, no judging, no sneering.
What is (Be)Gentle?
"I want to change and am doing my best AND I still need to do better, try harder and be more motivated to change" is an example of what.
What is Dialectical Thinking or Walking the Middle Path?
I don't deserve to get what I want or need.
What is a myth that gets in the way of IE?
BONUS: challenge the myth "I don't deserve to get what I want or need."
The three "how" skills
What are non-judgmental, one mindful and effectiveness.
Bonus: define non-judgmental
The "A" of the MAN of DEAR MAN
What is Appear confident?
Bonus: Demonstrate Appearing Confident without using words.
Use a little humor, Smile, Be light-hearted, soft over hard sell.
What is Easy Manner?
Bonus: Demonstrate Easy Manner - you are with your best buddy and you are going to talk to her about the sticking with original departure date for your hiking trip because she had changed the plans and now wants to leave a day later than had been originally planned.
True or False:
"My emotions are my problem and don't effect others."
False
Emotions are transactional and can change how people relate to each other.
The F. A. S. T. of FAST skill
What is
be Fair,
no Apologies,
Stick to values, and
be Truthful?
The three "what" skills
What are observe, describe and participate?
What is Objectives Effectiveness?
GIVE + DEAR MAN skills are used when this Effectiveness is the top priority.
What is Relationship Effectiveness?
If I am looking at: Capabilities, priorities, self-respect, rights, authority, relationship, long-term versus short-term goals, give and take, homework, timing.
What are Factors to Consider when asking for something or saying no
FAST + DEAR MAN skills are used when this Effectiveness is the top priority.
What is Self-Respect Effectiveness?
Bonus: Give an example when you could of or did used the FAST skill.