Yes/No
Each body paragraph should focus on two main idea only. (Yes/No)
Yes.
Conclusion: “Finally, my favorite argument is that punishment should be fixed because it is simple to apply.”
(Mistake: Personal preference should not appear in a discuss essay conclusion)
A discuss essay can only include advantages, not disadvantages. (Yes/No)
No. It can be (advantages/disadvantages) (benefits/drawback) (for/against)
Thesis: "This essay will talk about fixed punishment and its negatives/positives".
Too vague; it doesn’t introduce the main points or outlines the discussion. Informal language "will talk about".
The introduction should include a thesis statement stating the history of the topic. (Yes/No)
No. It should state the essay's main arguments/points.
Conclusion: “In conclusion, punishments have advantages and disadvantages. Government should decide when to use fixed punishments according to its needs".
Too brief; conclusion should restate the thesis and summarize main points clearly. Recommendation is too general.
The conclusion can introduce new arguments. (Yes/No)
No.
Controversy: “The controversy over fixed punishments is that some people think they are fair, however, in my opinion, everyone should decide for themselves.”
1- Personal opinion appears in the sentence; a discuss essay should present the controversy without stating personal opinion in the introduction or body.
2- The sentence mixes ideas awkwardly (“however” is used incorrectly) and lacks a clear focus on both sides of the controversy.
The controversy should state the main arguments discussed in the essay. (Yes/No)
No. It should state the arguments around the topic in general.
General Statement: “Fixed punishments are the best solution for all crimes because they are fair and easy to apply.”
Reveals the topic and the stance immediately instead of starting with a broad/general context.