What hands and a face but can't hold anything or smile?
A clock
When Grant was 8, his brother was half his age. Now, Grant is 14. How old is his brother?
10
Why are teddy bears never hungry?
Because they are always stuffed
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide
What sport has four letters, is played all around the world, and begins with a T
Golf
It belongs to you but your friends use it more. What is it?
Your name
Two fathers and 2 sons spent the day fishing, but only caught 3 fish. This was enough for each of them to have one fish. How is this possible
Father, son, grandfather only three fishing
What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom
Odor in the court
Why did the spider go to the computer?
to check his web site
Why did the ballerina quit?
It was tutu hard
Kate's mother has three children-Snap, Crackle, and _____
Kate
How do you make the number 7 even without addition, subtraction, multiplication, or division?
Drop the s
Where does a boat go when it's not feeling well?
To the dock
What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk
How is a baseball team similar to a pancake?
They both need a really good batter
If you don't keep me, I'll break. What am I?
a promise
How many sides does a circle have?
2-the inside and the outside
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn't chicken
Why are basketball players such messy eaters?
Because they always dribble
What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it?
the word short
How many times can you subtract the number 5 from 25?
Once-after that, it's not 25 anymore
Why did the lion spit out the clown?
Because he tasted funny.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear
What is the hardest part about skydiving?
The ground