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The more of me you take, the more you leave behind
Footsteps
A man gave one son 10 cents and another son was given a dollar. What time is it?
1:50 (One Fifty)
A man is lying dead in a room. There's a puddle of water and broken glass. How did he die?
He was a goldfish; the bowl broke
What has to be broken before you can use it?
An Egg
What has hands but can't clap?
A clock
I can be cracked, made, told, and played. What am I?
A joke
I am three-digit number. My tens digit is five more than my ones digit, and my hundreds digit is eight less than my tens digit. What number am I?
194
A woman shoots her husband, then holds him underwater for five minutes. Then, she hangs him. Yet ten minutes later, they go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner. How?
She took a photograph of him and developed it
I have keys but open no locks. I have space but no room. You can enter, but you can't leave. What am i?
A keyboard
What has an eye but cannot see
I'm not alive, but I can grow. I don't have lungs, but I need air. What am I?
Fire
If two's company and three's a crowd, what are four and five
Nine
A man was murdered in his office. The suspects were the cook, the gardener, the maid, and the banker. The only clue was a calendar with "6, 4, 9, 10, 11" written on it. Who was the Killer?
The Maid (the numbers represent the first letter of months: June, April, Sept, Oct, Nov)
A cowboy rides into town on Friday, stays three days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible?
His Horse's name is Friday
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel
What five-letter word becomes shorted when you add two letters to it?
Short
You see a boat filled with people, but there isn't a single person on board. How is that possible?
Everyone is married
A man is running away from a bear. He finds two doors. One leads to a room full of fire, and the other has a lion that hasn't eaten in three years. Which door does he choose?
The lions room - because the lion is dead
A plane crashes on the border of the U.S and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors?
Nowhere - Survivors aren't buried
What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?
A penny
I speak without a mouth and hear without ears. I have no body, but I come alive with the wind. What am I?
An echo
What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?
A man was found murdered on a Sunday morning. His wife said she was sleeping, the chef was cooking breakfast, the gardener was planting seeds, the maid was getting the mail, and the butler was polishing the silverware. Who did it?
The Maid - mail isn't delivered on Sundays
If you drop me, I'm sure to crack, but give me a smile, and I'll always smile back. What am I?
A mirror
What begins with T, ends with T, and has T in it?
A teapot