FFT-CW ES

Rumble/Shared Qualities/Caring Days

100

What is a rumble?

A rumble is a discussion, conversation, or meeting defined by a commitment to lean into vulnerability, to stay curious and generous, to stick with the messy middle of problem identification and solving, to take a break and circle back when necessary, to be fearless in owning our parts, and, as psychologist Harriet Lerner teaches, to listen with the same passion with which we want to be heard. More than anything else, when someone says, “Let’s rumble,” it cues me to show up with an open heart and mind so we can serve the work and each other, not our egos.

200

What should we avoid during rumble? 

accusations, yelling

300

Three things you can do to show you care to one another

Play catch, paint, watch mystery/true crime together

400

Give two examples of good responses during a rumble? 

any two!

500

We Have Fun When We....

 go on the boat, go outside, watch TV, go out to eat, Bowling(need to do)

Time and Place/Check Ins

100

How do we normally check in?

Ask about one another's day?

200

What does time and place mean?

That there is a proper time and place to discuss issues.

300

Give an example of a wish and a worry? How could this help prepare for a rumble?

Any example!

This could help us discuss what we are worried about and arrange appropriate time and place

400

Name a good time and place to discuss conflict.

Feeling rested, alert, scheduled time, In private, at home, when driving

500

Name a bad time and place to discuss conflict

When mad/emotional, in the middle of a task, in the morning as soon as we wake up, right before bed, In front of "mixed" company(different gender), in public, other family members

Avoiding Acting Out In Emotion and Taming Behavior Tips

100

Give three avoiding anger tips for yourself

Any three!

200

Give three avoiding acting out in emotion tips for someone else

Situation, Options, Disadvantages, Advantages, Solution

300

Give three taming behavior tips for someone else

Any Three!

400

What are everyone's warning signs? 

• *Emily- crying, red face, eye color will change from Gray to Blue, will stutter, shut   down, tone will change(louder, sharper), will feel vulnerable. 
• Aunt Cheri- face can get red, tone will change, will have the urge to pace, and the urge to match the energy of others.                       
• Wyatt- become sarcastic, groans, become restless, shut down
• Uncle Vince- will become passive aggressive(“thumbs up” text, short answers”) avoidance, may feel resentment, tone will change, heart will race.*

500

What is your favorite tip?

Any of em!

Unhelpful Thinking Styles/Active Listening

100

Name two unhealthy thinking style you struggle with

Any two!

200

How do you check to make sure you understood the other person?

Say in your own words what you think the other person said. Be sure not to put words in someone else’s mouth.

300

What does labelling mean? Give an example of when you labeled yourself, AND someone else

any two example

400

What is Active Listening? Give an example

Repeating back ALL  of what you hear the other person say, to ensure you heard them correctly. It can also help you to hold on to the positives of what was said instead of just the negatives.

500

What are two ways we jump to conclusions? Give an example of you or a family member doing each one. 

Mind reading, Fortune Telling

Wild Card

100

What is a relapse?

• When we slide back into something we have recovered from.

200

Why can eating healthy help us avoid acting out in emotion? 

Healthier foods can help our brains produce healthy mood boosting chemicals, that can help with anxiety, etc. 

300

What are some rumble conversations we've had success with?

Name at least one

400

Give an example of how your family has progressed in treatment

any example!

500

When you don't understand someone, what can you do? 

Ask questions when something is not clear – avoid “why?” questions, which tend to blame and make people defensive. “I’m not sure I understand. What happened first?”