Video Games
A group of animals imprisoned in inescapable plastic are forced by a sadistic, invisible hand to roll across precarious floating platforms to escape their existential dread and collect fruit, all while screaming in terror and plunging into the abyss over and over again. It’s a simulation disguised as a cute party game. Playing with friends often leads to intense, unbridled rage during the mini-games which are secretly designed to destroy friendships. Basically, it's a gambling simulator where the currency is your remaining sanity.
Monkey Ball
A small child with gravity-defying hair solves a puzzle, waking up an ancient Egyptian gambler who steals souls using children's toys. A rich man refuses therapy for his obsession with losing to dragons, while friends scream to win, because the actual rules is overrated.
Yu-Gi-Oh
A mother leaves her two children completely alone to stare at a wall on a rainy day. Suddenly, a 6-foot tall, fast-talking animal with headwear breaks and enters, ignores a fish’s advice, and refuses to leave. He brings in two manic creatures who destroy the living room, fly kites indoors, and break several safety regulations. Just as the kids are about to face the consequences, he pulls a bizarre cleaning machine out of a box, fixes everything, and disappears, leaving no evidence of his trespassing. The lesson? Breaking and entering is fine as long as you clean up your mess with a magical vacuum before your mom gets home.
The Cat In The Hat
A group of four homeless hipsters drive around the country in a painted van, ruthlessly targeting the elderly. Whenever a local business owner tries to save their failing business through creative costuming, these teenagers break in, assault the owner, and rip the mask off their face to publicly shame them. They are led by an animal who has a speech impediment and a bottomless stomach for snacks of questionable origin.
Scooby-Doo
A CGI rabbit with severe abandonment issues runs away to Hollywood to play drums, gets hit by a 37-year-old human slacker, and they team up to stop a chicken coup led by a chick.
Hop
A game where you pilot plastic anti-gravity bathtubs at dangerous speeds, aiming to become the richest, fastest, and most exploded driver in the galaxy. Featuring no items, it’s just pure adrenaline. There is no plot, just tracks of high-speed chaos where you try to other people explode. A bunch of colorful idiots, including a bounty hunter who is better known for yelling in a different game series than actually winning his own races. A different racing game got too popular and made too much money, leaving it to rot in a ditch, much like your machine when you hit a landmine.
F-Zero
A moody 15-year-old is forced to drive a giant robot because the military is incompetent, ends up fighting a guy wearing a bright red mask who refuses to wear a helmet in space. Space colonies are dropped on Earth like garbage, and everyone acts surprised.
Gundam
An ancient Transylvanian landlord gets bored, moves to London to flip real estate, and develops a crippling addiction to local blood, all while avoiding mirrors and acting like a moody, shape-shifting goth teenager. He annoys a group of Victorians, including a very sleepy solicitor and a professor who is terrible at his job, until they finally kill him with a butter knife.
Dracula
A documentary about strange headed boys who blatantly violate many laws and codes on a daily basis. They construct lethal rides and rays in the suburban area without a permit. Their sibling is the only responsible citizen trying to alert the authorities, but by the time the government arrives, all evidence of the felonies has miraculously vanished, gaslighting them into insanity.
Phineas and Ferb
A nerdy linguist gets funded by a rich guy to find a location, mostly because everyone else thinks he's a joke. He joins a team of mercenaries, a mole-obsessed geologist, and a sweet-talking doctor who all survive a mechanical lobster attack. They find a glowing, blue-rock civilization, but the commander tries to steal the city's power source to sell it.
Atlantis The Lost Empire
You wake up on a 2x2 pile of trash in the middle of a flooded apocalypse. Instead of panicking, you use a plastic hook to punch the ocean until a floating barrel appears, containing enough wood to expand your floating garbage pile by one square. Meanwhile, a psycho shark with a personal vendetta against your structural engineering degree keeps eating your foundation because you dared to place a cooking pot too close to the edge. You spend 90% of your time fighting a shark in your underwear, 5% fighting for air in underwater ruins, and 5% wondering why you are turning into a professional plastic recycler. You will eventually build a floating mansion and never find land, but at least you have a pet seagull named "Dinner"
Raft
A ten-year-old child is kicked out of his house to go on a nationwide, government-sanctioned quest to abduct sentient wildlife. A trio of incompetent adults tries to steal one specific animal, but they are constantly thwarted because they keep breaking the law in front of a police officer who prefers to watch child fighting instead. The world is inhabited by nightmare fuel, such as a hairless sheep that turns into a dragon, or a ghost that carries a mask of its own human face, or a teapot that wants to kill you. He spends 25 years in the same movies watching giant lizards destroy cities while he tries to save the God from having a mental breakdown.
Pokémon
Two unsupervised children in Pennsylvania, a nerd with a backpack and a reckless girl with no survival instinct, find a treehouse filled with books in their woods. Instead of calling the police about the strange treehouse, they decide to climb into it. She inevitably wishes to go to the place in one of the books, and a magical force teleports them back in time without parental consent. The plot of every book they land in a dangerous time period. The girl instantly runs toward danger or pets a dangerous animal while the boy screams "We're going to die!" or "Are you crazy?" while taking notes. They meet a famous historical figure, solve a simple riddle, and steal a small object. They escape just in time, return home, and zero time has passed, meaning they can lie to their parents about where they were. The series involves them becoming ravens, dogs, and hiding in a bear fight, all to please a magical lady who sometimes turns into a mouse. Basically reckless time-traveling siblings risk their lives for research for an elderly librarian.
The Magic Treehouse
A twelve year-old runs away from his responsibilities to start an exotic travel vlog. He travels around the world on a bison, actively avoiding work while playing an intense game of global tag with a brooding teenager who really cares about his honor. Eventually, he saves the world by taking away a bad guy's bending privileges because he forgot to do his summer reading.
Avatar The Last Airbender
A clumsy teen obsessed with a boy's calendar finds magical jewelry, allowing her to become a spotted superhero who fights her own emotions. She teams up with a cat-themed boy who is technically her boss's son, but they can't figure out they are classmates because of plot-induced blindness. Every day, a man in a waistcoat gets angry at a pigeon or a broken toaster, prompting her boss—who is also her crush's dad—to send a butterfly to turn them into fashion-disaster supervillains. The heroes win by shouting and using a random toaster, then the girl screams the name of the show fixing everything, including the trauma, in a lazy reset.
You play as a corporate employee who survives a spaceship crash only to realize his HR department has completely abandoned him on a water planet run by murderous fish. Instead of calling for rescue, you spend 30 hours eating raw bladderfish, building a high-tech base, and screaming at the top of your lungs because a giant orange snake-worm keeps trying to hug your miniature submarine. The plot involves curing a planetary space-virus, but honestly, you’ll spend most of your time terrified of the dark, collecting scrap metal, and wondering why you didn't just stay in the lifepod. Eventually, you build a rocket, escape, and leave behind a multi-billion dollar debt to your employers for all the oxygen you used.
Subnautica
A sentient, philosophical collection of human gas is expelled from a man's rear end and decides to become a life coach. This brown, fluffy fart solves the mundane problems of townspeople—like helping a girl confess her love or cheering up a sad dog—by simply being a respectful, sentient fart. The entire show is animated in Microsoft Paint, voiced by one guy, and features a theme song about how cool it is to fart. It is the most respectable piece of garbage ever created.
Onara Gorou (The Fart Anime)
An edgy supercomputer gets sentient, decides it’s a goth teenager, and kills everyone except five people because it needs a captive audience to be a sadistic dungeon master. The story is essentially a 109-year road trip to find canned food, only to discover the computer forgot to give them a can opener. The group deals with this by playing "stab your friend with an icicle" to win at life. The narrator manages to kill everyone else, but because he was too good at his job, the computer turns him into a sentient jelly bean and ruins his social life forever. In short, A sentient calculator ruins five people's lives because it can't feel emotions or play mobile games.
I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream
A series about a child with short-term memory loss who wanders unsupervised into dangerous jungles. She frequently breaks the fourth wall to scream at silence, asking invisible people to locate objects. She is constantly stalked by a masked fox attempting to mug her, but he is legally required to stop if she says a common word three times.
Dora The Explorer
Imagine if a blender, a bucket of blood, and a 1990s comic book had a baby, and that baby only knew how to scream "REVENGE." A guy with all the emotional range of a brick wall is back to punish people. Within the first five minutes, he crashes a fancy dinner party, kills everyone, and tosses a mobster into a glass-crushing machine. He survives, but he now looks like a jigsaw puzzle put together by a drunken toddler, so he calls himself Jigsaw. Jigsaw and his cartoonishly deranged brother, who literally eats a guy’s kidney, decide to kill him by hiring every cliché gangster in New York City.
Punisher: War Zone
You drive a big rig. There is no cargo, no cargo loading, and no actual racing. You are just driving in a void. It is you vs. an opponent truck. The opponent is literally programmed to sit still and never move, making you the undisputed champion of the universe instantly. Laws of physics? Never heard of her. You can drive up 90-degree vertical mountains, turn instantly, and drive through houses, bridges, and trees as if they are holograms. If you hold down the forward button, you will accelerate to infinite speed literally, the speedometer just keeps spinning and never stop, even if you drive off the edge of the world. After winning, the game simply tells you YOU'RE WINNER and puts a trophy on the screen. It's not a game; it's a "break the world" simulator where the only enemy is your own boredom.
Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing
Imagine Ghost in the Shell, but instead of a cool cyborg lady, you have a sentient, floating USB stick that acts like a depressed teenager. A human brain, trapped in a metallic potato, who spends 12 episodes trying to figure out which button makes him stop looking like a low-poly PS1 asset. A police officer steals the sentient USB drive, who is the main character, and constantly tries to plug him into different, equally broken machines, hoping for a better frame rate. Characters slide across the screen without moving their legs, fight enemies who are clearly just frozen images, and occasionally, a 2D anime girl appears to remind you that 3D animation was a mistake.
Ex-Arm
A socially awkward teenage girl with zero survival instincts moves to a rainy town and falls in love with way older high school student who spends his free time watching her sleep, breaking into her room, and whining about how much he wants to drink. Instead of calling the police, she decides it's "romantic" that he sparkles like a disco ball in the sun and is "heavy as a rock". They fight a baseball-playing creature, almost die, and she decides to marry him before graduating high school so she can stop being a human and join his cult of adopted siblings.
Twilight
A hyperactive dog accidentally joins the CIA because he treated a highly classified headquarters like a chew toy. He is given a gun and a license to kill despite having the IQ of a tennis ball. He is partnered with a serious, martial-arts-fighting cat who does 99% of the actual work while he chases his own tail and eats garbage. Together, they fight a villainous rat who is allergic to his own evil plans, proving that national security is best left in the hands of a pet who gets distracted by shiny objects.
T.U.F.F Puppy
A fish suddenly remembers she has parents—conveniently, right after she and a dad fish finally got their life back to normal. She drags the very stressed-out dad fish and a teenage fish across the ocean to California to find them, mostly because she keeps having flashbacks and shouting. They end up a fish prison with better marketing. She gets captured, and dad fish and teenage fish have to spend most of the movie standing around doing nothing important while she makes friends with a depressed, shapeshifter who only has seven tentacles and just wants to go to Cleveland. Meanwhile, she wanders around forgetting she's looking for her parents, then remembering again, in a plot that relies heavily on her memory working only when it's convenient. She also gets help from a nearsighted whale shark who thinks she's a dolphin and a beluga who can't figure out his echolocation. The climax involves a literal, high-speed, 18-wheeler truck hijacking by a fish and an octopus, which is honestly the best part of the movie. In the end, she finds her parents living in a shell maze, her memory is still broken, and she learns that if you always swim, you'll eventually find your family and a shapeshifter to drive you home.
Finding Dory