Head
Is trauma something that happens in: -Lots of families? -Or not many families?
What would you say to a friend who thought that the trauma that they went through was their fault?
It is not your fault. It is only the fault of the person who did the hurting.
How many light feelings can you come up with? Say as many as you can come up with. Act out a light feeling and try to get others to guess it.
Proud, peaceful, happy, excited, calm, safe, confident, etc.
When Lionel gets mad, muscle relaxers help lighten his feeling. Lead others in doing a muscle relaxer of your choice.
Lemon squeeze, strong arms, elephant stomach, sandy toes, etc.
Lafayette the Labrador barks at every noise he hears. His body alarm tells him that there might be danger. Is his barking protecting Fight, Flight or Freeze? What would you do to help Lafayette calm down if there's no danger?
Fight! What does your fight response look like?
After a trauma, do children sometimes have bad dreams about it?
To get back to sleep after a bad dream, what can a child: - Say to themselves to feel less scared? - Do as a relaxer lying down in their bed to calm their body?
Nightmares are a common reaction to trauma.
They could tell themselves - I am safe now. Bad dreams are normal and I am safe.
They could do muscle relaxation, take deep breaths, or use imagery to calm their body.
How many heavy feelings can you come up with together? Name as many as you can think of. Act out a heavy feeling and try to get others to guess it.
Sad, scared, disappointed, angry, lonely, irritated, anxious, worried, embarrassed, jealous, ashamed, guilty, disgusted, etc.
When Luke feels upset, the 5 Senses help lighten his feelings. Lead others in doing 5 Senses. 5 things you see. 4 things you feel. 3 things you hear. 2 things you smell. 1 thing you taste.
Lead us!
A teacher at Angelica’s school looks like someone in her past who hurt her. Angelica’s alarm system starts going off just being around this teacher. What signs might tell Angelica that her body’s alarm system has started? What can she do once she notices these reactions?
Her muscles might feel tense, her heart might race, breathing faster, she might notice the urge to want to avoid/skip school to not see that teacher. She can use a relaxer to lighten the feeling. Going to school and facing her fear will also help because she can use a relaxer to stay in the moment!
After a trauma, do children try hard not to remember what happened? Why? What are 3 things a child can do to feel better when memories of trauma get stuck in their brain?
It is normal to avoid thinking about what happened because it is upsetting/scary/distressing to think about. But avoiding thinking about it doesn't make the thoughts go away.
They can talk to an adult about what they are feeling, use a relaxer, change the channel/thought stopping, or challenge unhelpful thoughts.
Name 4 heavy feelings that kids might have after going through a trauma. Who are 3 helpful adults you can go to for support if you are having heavy feelings? Pretend that you are telling a counselor that you are having a heavy feeling and would like to do a relaxer.
Any heavy feeling! Parents, teachers, coaches, counselors, etc.
Fun activities can help lighten our heavy thoughts, feelings and memories. Let’s do some charades! Using no words, get the group to guess 3 activities that are fun for you. Some ideas include: dancing, video games, writing in a journal, basketball, singing
Whatever you come up with!
After Brian went through a trauma, he gets angered easily and gets in trouble more often. Is it common to feel angry more often after trauma happens? Can this get better over time? When Brian notices his anger increasing, what can he do?
It is normal to feel more angry and irritable after going through a traumatic event. It gets better! Brian can use his relaxers to lighten his heavy angry feelings.
Since the trauma happened, Reece worries that something bad will happen when she is away from her family. Pretend that you are helping Reece feel less worried. What can you say to help her know that her grownups are safe?
What's the evidence that they are safe? What are the facts of the situation?
What scale can we use to describe how much of a feeling we are having? What is 1 feeling you had during your trauma and what number was it on the scale? What is 1 feeling you are having now and what level?
Emotion Thermometer (SUDs scale)
Give an example of a time when it’s good that we have an internal alarm system to look out for danger and protect ourselves. Does trauma sometimes make our alarm systems go off more quickly? How can daily use of relaxers help our alarm systems work better?
Yes! After experiencing a trauma it is normal to have our fight-flight-freeze response go off more quickly.
How we think, what we feel and what we do are all connected. Map the Think-Feel-Do in this situation: Maria walks into math class and realizes that she forgot to bring her homework back. She knows her teacher is going to collect them when class starts.
What thoughts does she have? How do those thoughts make her feel? What does that thought make her want to do?
After the trauma, Julio worries that something bad will happen when he is at school. Sometimes he tries to stay home from school because he is so worried. What are 3 ways grown-ups make sure that kids at school are safe? Could remembering this help Julio feel safer?
They supervise so kids are never alone. They have a front desk people have to sign in at before getting to come into the building. We practice lock downs to know what to do in an emergency.
When Sophie is reminded of the trauma that happened, she has strong feelings in her body. What are 4 body reactions we might feel when we are scared or upset?
Heart racing, fast breathing, muscles tense, shaky, stomachache, have to go to the bathroom, sweaty, dizzy, weak, pins and needles, etc.
Before the trauma happened, Eliza used to love playing soccer. Now it feels like her heart isn’t in it. Should Eliza quit soccer or will this feeling get better as she goes through counseling? How can soccer help Eliza cope after her trauma?
It's normal to lose interest in activities we used to love doing after a trauma. Counseling can help lighten heavy feelings and soccer is a good way of doing something fun to reduce heavy feelings!
Aaron sometimes doesn’t want to go to counseling because he has heavy feelings when he talks about his traumas. - Do you think talking in counseling gets easier over time? - How can Aaron tell his caregivers and counselor how he’s feeling? - How can they help?
When we start talking about what happened it can get easier because we learn that we're safe even when we're revisiting a scary memory.