What Valentine's Day candy is only for girls?
Hershey's!
What 's the Easter Bunny's favorite restaurant?
IHOP!
What do ghosts eat for dessert?
Ice Cream!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off!
What does the Gingerbread Man use to make his bed?
Cookie Sheets!
What kind of candy is always late?
Chocolate!
What's the Easter Bunny's favorite music?
Hip-Hop!
What has a hundred ears, but can't hear a thing?
A cornfield!
What do you call a running turkey?
Fast Food!
Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?
Because they're Santa's Starbucks!
What did the calculator say to the pencil?
You can always count on me!
What happened to the egg when it was tickled?
It cracked up!
What do Italian ghosts eat?
Spook-hetti!
What did the turkey say before he was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!
Where do you find reindeer?
It depends on where you leave them!
Why did the man send his wife's valentine on Twitter?
Because she is his tweet heart!
Where does the Easter Bunny get his eggs?
An eggplant!
What genre of music does a mummy like best?
Wrap!
When do you serve tofu turkey?
Pranksgiving!
What cars do elves drive?
toyYoda!
What did a French chef give his wife on Valentine's Day?
A hug and a quiche!
What do you call a bunny who has fleas?
Bugs Bunny!
Where do ghosts like to travel?
The Dead Sea!
Why do turkeys always go "gobble, gobble"?
Because they never learned good table manners!
Why did they couple get hitched on the 24 of December?
So they could have a married Christmas!