Ari's True Feelings
What does Ari like most about Kevon?
I like your humor, your commitment, your dedication to learning - whether it's about movies or the people around you, and the way you're down for anything with me. The last part especially is my favorite because it feels like we can be on the same wavelength sometimes. It's nice having someone to match my crazy.
Where does Ari want to see this relationship in a month or two?
I want to see us communicate better. I don't want any unnecessary comments. I also want to get to a point where I fully trust you. It's hard for me to let people in and even harder for me to trust them entirely. I understand your intentions with me, I just need to get over my reservations and stop being scared that you have some secret motive or you're not being completely honest about your feelings of me.
Ari's goals with her anxiety
Anxiety
I'm sorry about my anxiousness. I know it's not the easiest to deal with, especially when I start to spiral and upset myself with hypothetical situations. My anxiety isn't controllable but how I act as a result of it is and I apologize that I haven't been dealing with it in the most healthy manner. I know actions mean more than words, so I'm hoping you see my dedication and attendance with therapy as me taking action. It'll get better once I'm able to learn more about myself.
What is Ari most afraid of?
I'm most afraid of fully committing to a relationship again, only for it not to work out. I'm afraid that you might consider me to be a burden in your life. I don't like opening up because I feel like it puts too much pressure on the people around me. And then when I do open up, it usually creates this huge conflict that I wanted to avoid in the first place.
Where does Ari see this relationship in three to four months?
I would like to see us connected more emotionally and physically. I want to hang out with you and I want us to build memories.
Ari's goals with her trust issues.
I don't completely distrust you. I trust you enough to open up emotionally and bring you on my journey of growth. However, it is a bit difficult to completely trust you when it comes to how you feel about me. I'm hoping as time goes on, that trust will begin to grow naturally.
Not being completely honest
I'm really sorry that I wasn't completely transparent with you about my trust issues. I should've told you and I ended up doing more harm than good. I do want you to know that just because i wasn't truthful in that aspect, doesn't mean I'm not in other aspects. I have been completely honest about my feelings for you and where I want to see our relationship. I would never open up to someone I didn't care about or seriously think about their role in my life.
What is Ari's ultimate goal?
I want us to reach our full potential. I imagine you in my life weeks for now, but I want to grow to imagining you months for now, years from now, and even a lifetime. If we're meant to be in each other's lives we need to learn how to navigate through our issues so we can achieve that.
Ari's goals with her listening skills
I want to get better at listening to the things you say and trusting your words. Not only am I stubborn and stuck in my ways, but I can get a bit obsessive over the manner in which people speak. Whether it be their tone or the words they use and I end up losing the greater picture
Not respecting boundaries
I'm so sorry for not respecting your boundaries. There's no excuse and I should've let you know what I was trying to do initially to see if you would end up being okay with it. Your boundaries are your boundaries - no matter how big or small - and I have to accept that.