Situations for Interpersonal Effectiveness
When hurts and problems build up, using skills to head off problems and ending hopeless relationships is and example of:
a) Balancing priorities vs. demands
b) Attending to relationships
c) Balancing the wants to should
B) attending to relationships
“I have to know whether a person is going to say yes before I make a request” is an example of:
a) Myth of IE
b) Challenge of IE
c) Cheerleading statement
a) Myth of IE
Deciding whether a person is able to give you what you want is what factor affecting you intensity of asking/saying no?
Capability
The “D” in DEAR MAN stands for what?
Describe the current situation
How does someone “be gentle” when using the GIVE skill?
No attacks, no threats, no judging.
In the “balancing the wants-to-shoulds” the “wants” refers to what?
something that gives you pleasure or something you want to do.
State a challenge to "everyone hates me."
State your challenge.
In factors to consider, what does it mean to "do your homework/"
Know the facts to support request, are you clear about what you are asking, etc.
What does it mean to be a Broken Record?
Keep asking, saying no, or expressing your opinion over and over is what skill?
The “V” in GIVE stands for what?
Validate
Bonus 100: Give an example of a validation.
Your friend wants you to see a scary movie, but you do not like scary movies. What skill would you use in saying no?
Broken Record
Give a challenge to the statement “I must be really inadequate if I can’t fix this myself.”
State your challenge.
Example: I cannot do everything myself: there is strength in numbers: we all need help sometimes, etc.
What factor to consider asks: I am responsible for directing the person or telling the person what to do because “I’m the boss” is an example of what factor affecting intensity to ask/say no?
Authority
When you use "I feel" in DEAR MAN what skill is that?
Express
What is the FAST skill used for?
a) Get what you want
b) Keep a relationship
c) Maintain your self-respect
c) Maintain your self-respect
Name one way to move from victim to survivor in a DRAMA Triangle.
1. State what you want
2. Keep agreements
3. Ask yourself
4. Recognize the positives
Example how myths can effect your relationships?
Myths are false thoughts that can effect the way we feel, act/respond to the people around us.
In factors to consider, what does it mean to look at timing?
Is it a good time, is the person "in the mood," are you catching the person when they are likely to say yes/no. Is this a bad time to say no? Should you hold off on asking.
What does it mean to turn the tables?
The skill of doing things to help others.
What does the T stand for in FAST and what does it mean?
(be) truthful
Don’t lie, act helpless or exaggerate
How does someone “build mastery” in interpersonal relationships?
Interacting in a way that makes you feel competent, not acting helpless or overly dependent, standing up for yourself, following wise mind.
Thinking about consequences, e.g. “they won’t like me”, not believing you deserve what you want, and calling yourself names is an example of what factor reducing IE?
Thinking errors or worry thoughts
How could the boy in the book The Giving Tree practiced the Give and Take skill?
Gave the tree water.
Come up with a DEAR MAN skill on how to ask for a
sleep over with a friend
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Is allowing someone to take as much as they can from you an example of an unhealth or healthy boundaries?
Unhealthy