DEARMAN
What is the goal when using DEARMAN?
What is to get what you want or say no to something.
What is the goal when using GIVE?
What is keeping a good relationship or relationship effectiveness
What is the goal when using FAST?
What is self-respect effectiveness or keeping your self-respect.
When might we use evaluating options?
What is when we are trying to consider how strongly to ask or say no to something.
Name a skill that has been most helpful to you.
Various answers
Which of these is an ASSERTIVE statement:
I'm upset you didn't listen when I told you about my day.
I would like you to listen to me when I'm talking about my day.
What is "I would like you to listen to me when I'm talking about my day."
Smiling is an example of this step in GIVE
What is use an Easy manner
True or False: Apologies are always necessary when using the FAST skill.
True or False: We don't need to consider all the facts of a situation before saying yes or no to something.
False. It is more effective to do our homework and know the facts.
A woman is in a burning building and she is looking out the window, a baby in her arms. A fireman looks up and sees the scene before him. Which would be a more validating response:
The fireman telling the woman, "Wow that looks scary!" or,
The fireman goes to save the woman and her baby.
True or False, you must actually be confident in order to assert yourself.
What is false, you only have to ACT confident.
Define validation
What is showing through words or actions that you understand the other person's feelings, point of view, thoughts, or actions
Why is it important to be truthful and fair while using FAST?
What is it helps keep self-respect and feel as though are acting and responding effectively and according to my values.
True or False: When you are asking for something, you would raise the intensity of asking.
What is true.
False. We want to make sure you are coming and that you are safe!
What do you have to be mindful of when using DEARMAN in any given situation?
What is being mindful of the goal of the conversation, focusing, attacks, threats, asides, derailing comments, etc.
Name each step in GIVE
What is be Gentle, act Interested, Validate, use an Easy manner
Name each step in FAST
What is be Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, and Truthfulness
Identify four factors to consider for evaluating options.
What is Capability, Priorities, Self-respect, Rights, Authority, Relationship, Goals, Give and Take, Homework, and Timing
True or False: You should use phone coaching for when you need help with homework and what skills to use in the moment.
True.
Name each step in DEARMAN
Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, and Negotiate
If your sibling asks you to watch her kids for the third night in a row, and you would rather have a night at home to yourself, what is your relationship effectiveness goal?
Various answers, could be: Keep sibling liking you, seek understanding from sibling about your time and energy, etc.
Use FAST in the following scenario:
You've been working at your job for a year and a half and you have not gotten a raise. You decide to go and talk to your boss about getting a raise.
F: I've been working at this job for a while now and my work ethic has been good, and I'm on time. I would like a raise to reflect my hard work.
A: No apologies necessary.
S: Value might be hard work, respect for self
T: Notice if these are the facts and you are not exaggerating.
What is Wise Mind.
What does it mean to be dialectical?
What is considering both sides to be true at the same time.