❄️WINTER WIPEOUTS❄️
🥌IF JOBS WERE OLYMPIC SPORTS🥌
🎿"ROLL THE TAPE" -THE JUDGES🎿
🏅PODIUM-ADJACENT
🏒HEATED RIVALRY🏒
200

This athlete self-reports a skiing performance best described as “did not qualify” (makes sense, shes from Cali).

Who is Lara Hicks?

200

This former valet parker mastered speed, precision, and not denting luxury vehicles.

Who is Ori Lev?

200

These athletes have unusual origin stories: one shares a birthday with their sibling — different years — and the other comes from ten generations of Floridians.

Who are Nikki Lu and Eric Conrad?

200

This person attended the Olympic opening ceremony, achieving peak fan credentials.

Who is Aidan Scible?

200

This NON-COMPETER brings maximum emotional intensity to every event, openly crying at movies, TV shows, and books — sometimes before the medal ceremony.

Who is Ben Berwick?

400

This former OLC skater brings enthusiasm, not technique, to the ice.

Who is Erica Newland?

400

This person once competed in the retail endurance event known as Toys “R” Us cashier.

 Who is Elias Boujaoude?

400

These competitors have unlikely personal histories: one relocated 6,216 miles, and the other’s great-grandfather was a photographer for the mob.

Who are Catherine Chen and Rachel Goodman?

400

This competitor shared the field with two athletes who later won Olympic gold.

Who is Rebecca Lullo?

400

These athletes bring stamina in different forms: one trains by weightlifting three times a week, and the other is usually the last to leave a dance floor.

Who are Martha Santizo and Beth Littrell?

600

This Coloradan trained with nearly 100 huskies in northern Finland — essentially a Winter Games side quest.

Who is Beau Tremitiere?

600

This Delawarean captained a party boat, an event requiring balance, leadership, and crowd control.

Who is Conor Gaffney?

600

This person’s high school experience included their father subpoenaing their boyfriend. Judges reviewed the footage.

Who is Genevieve Nadeau?

600

This COMPETE leader once competed as a fencer, blades included.

Who is Jess Marsden?

600

These competitors showed endurance in very different arenas: one placed second statewide in skeet shooting, and the other worked security at Bonnaroo for six years.

Who are Matt Peney and Molly Golski?

800

This Aaron Burr relative dreams of attending Krampusnacht, a winter festival that feels like an Olympic event with demons.

Who is Ellinor Heywood?

800

Before she held down the CT office, she cleaned operating rooms — a precision sport judged on perfection.

Who is JoAnna Suriani?

800

These competitors brushed the spotlight early: one auditioned for Nickelodeon’s All That, while the other has seen Taylor Swift in concert three times.

Who are Zach West and Caitlin Childs?

800

This Navy man is a qualified sharpshooter, biathlon scouts please take note.


Who is Kyle Miller?

800

This athlete demonstrates elite recovery skills, frequently falling asleep on planes before boarding is complete.

Who is Tobin Raju?

1000

This Vermonter ironically lacks balance on land but somehow excels once afloat.

Who is Jules Torti?

1000

These competitors worked jobs that deserve mascots: one briefly competed as Birdie from McDonald’s, and the other sorted returnable cans as a “bottle boy” at a Michigan party store.

Who are Janine Lopez and Michael Sandoval?

1000

This person attended a Balinese wedding as the guest of Ketut Liyer — the medicine man featured in Eat, Pray, Love.

Who is Shanna Singh Hughey?

1000

This person briefly shared a stalker with Janet Jackson, a fact confirmed after replay review.

Who is Genevieve Nadeau?

1000

This runner once competed in the half-mile — results described as “solid effort.”

Who is Shalini Goel Agarwal?