Cities Kristen has travelled to
The phrase ‘What happens here, stays here’ became synonymous with this tourism hotspot
Las Vegas
This man chose video games over releasing Kirsten from captivity.
Ben Murphy
LOCKED IN: Kristen can identify this artist after hearing 0.7 seconds of any song intro
Taylor Swift
This chaotic folk song has become Kirsten’s signature karaoke performance
Rattlin Bog
This recurring incident begins with tacos and ends with Kirsten fighting for her life in a bathroom.
Poyo
This city is home to Museum Island, a UNESCO World Heritage Site
Berlin
This hookup’s night ended with police involvement
Jerrion Henry
BANNED: Following photographic evidence from the late 2000s, Kirsten is no longer permitted to recreate this hairstyle
Side bangs
Following one particularly chaotic night out, Kirsten acquired this infamous hat, later nicknamed after a Catholic religious order.
The Jesuit hat
Despite being under the age of 70, Kirsten exclusively uses this device with the energy of a grandmother forwarding Minion memes
Her iPad
The Great Fire of 1666 devastated much of this capital
London
This hookup showed up equipped with underwear hanging on by pure optimism.
Benoit Leblanc
LOCKED IN: Public safety officials note Kirsten enters a spiritually transformed state whenever she sees these animals.
Bunny
While drunk, Kirsten would aggressively consume raw vegetables and refer to the activity exclusively by this term.
Chomping
Witnesses report that Kirsten and this coworker operate with the energy of a mother-daughter crime duo
Lisa
This city is nicknamed the ‘Eternal City.’
This hookup arrived with a receding hairline and the energy of a divorced assistant manager.
Phil Kerri
BANNED: Witnesses report Kirsten entered a psychologically altered state in an Italian McDonald’s and would not stop saying this.
Mamma Mia !!!!
Witnesses report that Kirsten becomes emotionally and spiritually committed to this behaviour after being presented with tequila.
Gagging
Authorities remain unable to explain why Kirsten and Sarah compulsively repeat this name when emotionally unwell.
JOOOOOOORDAN
This capital was the birthplace of writers James Joyce and Oscar Wilde
Dublin
This man proved that no matter how far you travel, New Jersey will always find you
Joe from Vegas
LOCKED IN: This retail establishment has repeatedly caused Kirsten to lose all sense of financial restraint.
Zara
Authorities confirmed Kirsten developed a deeply personal feud with this notoriously difficult science course
Organic chemistry
This nickname emerged during the Great Blister Incident