Childhood
villian origin story
3rd grade, alphabetically next to the kid that pooped himself
Virginity woes
First time I thought I lost it, it wasn't in, the second time was on a lofted bunk bed when the roommate was 20 ft away, I woke him up when I banged my head on the ceiling
Locked into unknown career
When applying to pharmacy school I had no idea what a pharmacist even did, I never stepped foot before in a CVS/Walgreens since my mom always picked up my script
Rebound lovebomb?
started dating a man prior to moving 1 month later, he flew to visit me a couple weeks after the move and informed me he was applying to jobs in Chicago to move for me..
I lived under a rock
Was not allowed to watch Youtube growing up, instead we could watch videos on GodTube, my sister and I would record and post covers (our Rockstar - Nickelback one got hundreds of views)
Apology letter
My ex and I were long distance and he bought a $450 flight to visit me, his parents found out and made him cancel it and got mad at him so I mailed them an apology letter, they had to approve every visit of mine
21st bday
Blacked out celebrating my 21st birthday and woke up in the ED, had a quiz for my class, arrived late because I had to wait for a SW to talk to me about substance abuse before discharge, I passed the quiz and immediately vomited after, my friends failed
Chicago news
after election results went to a protest, got immediately interviewed by a reporter and made the Chicago Tribune
Prom Dress Scandal
My HS made national news for our strict prom/homecoming dress code, we had to submit pics of our dresses and they had to get approved by admin for us to wear them to prom
unintentional free drugs
Picked up a solo cup at a frat party to not wait in the keg line, when in the bathroom with friends saw it had a bunch of brown sediment, two hours later I was zooted
CDC monitoring
After getting meningitis the CDC called me weekly for follow ups on who I was exposed to in case of college campus spread, this stopped once Covid hit
First 3sum
DMing a man on michigan's bball team prior to going to a game one weekend, he invited me in on my first 3sum with a random girl who was interested
Credit card theft
When I was first adopted and went over to people’s homes I would steal credit cards and money left in my view, I gave my parents a stack after a week and they had to call and apologize
College research
in college I did a research project with box turtles where I coded microprocessors and attached them on the shells to track them
On tv
Cameo
One of my favorite wnba players was doing cameos the week of my bday so I paid for one and let a lot of my home friends believe someone got it for me 🥲