Jobs
I tell computers to do things. Sometimes they listen.
Programmer
6 people drink coffee and date for 10 years.
An elderly man uses balloons to kidnap a small boy
Up
"I have an album drop due by Tuesday!"
Music majors
Education Majors
I drive a planned route to pick up and drop off tiny humans at government funded centers. I pick them up and bring them home later.
School Bus Driver
Random people in winter fight for a chair
Game of Thrones
Noseless guy has an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy
Harry Potter
Biology / Medicine Majors
"I have a robot due by Tuesday!"
Engineering majors
I bust through your front door and spray all your things down with water. You usually thank me afterward.
Firefighter
Student and teacher bond over cooking
Breaking Bad
Grumpy emo chick wonders if she should date a corpse or a dog.
Twilight
Linguistics
"I need to find the meaning of life by Tuesday!"
Philosophy majors
"But what really *is* due on Tuesday?"
We let people borrow dead trees with ink spills on them, as long as they promise to bring them back.
Librarian
Group spends 9 hours returning jewelry
Lord of the Rings
"I have a rock due by Tuesday!"
Geology
"I have to become President by Tuesday!"
Political Science Majors
I talk to myself in front of large numbers of people who are busy on their smartphones
Teacher
I talk to my imaginary friends and put them through unfathomable amounts of torture.
Horror Writer
Creepy rich guy hires dancing chocolate makers and then kills 4 children in front of their parents.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
"What
is due
on Tuesday,
but Myself?"
English / Poetry / Literature Majors
"I have a recession due by Tuesday."
Economics Majors