Motherhood & Recovery
What is one way a mother can model healthy coping skills for her children?
Talking about feelings, taking a break, asking for help, practicing mindfulness, etc. (Multiple answers allowed).
What is one healthy way to respond when you notice yourself becoming angry or overwhelmed with your child?
Possible answers: Take a pause, breath, step away if the child is safe, identify the emotion, or use another grounding/regulation skill.
What is one example of a healthy boundary a mother might set with a child?
Examples: setting limits around screen time, bedtime, respectful communication, personal space, or household responsibilities.
What is a trigger?
A trigger is something that increases thoughts, feelings, urges, or behaviors related to substance use.
What are three basic parenting approaches for responding to a child's behavior: Connect, redirect, and _____.
Set a limit. Parents can connect with the child's feelings, redirect the inappropriate behavior, and set a clear, appropriate limit.
True or False: Taking care of your own physical and emotional needs can support your ability to care for your children.
True: Taking care of your own needs can improve emotional regulation, energy, and ability to respond effectively to children.
True or False: Children can be affected by a parent's emotional state even when the parent does not directly talk about their feelings.
True. Children can often notice changes in tone, facial expression, body language, and behavior.
True or False: Setting a boundary means controlling another person's behavior.
False. A boundary communicates what you will do to protect your needs, safety, or well-being; it does not control another person's behavior.
Name one common stressor that could increase someone's risk of relapse while parenting.
Possible answers: sleep deprivation, financial stress, parenting conflict, lack of support, relationship conflict, isolation, feeling overwhelmed, or exposure to substances.
True or False: Children learn emotional regulation partly by watching how adults respond to and manage their own emotions.
True: Children learn through modeling and co-regulation.
What does self-care mean, and why can it be especially important during recovery?
Self-care means intentionally taking care of your physical, emotional, mental, and/or spiritual needs. It supports overall well-being and can help reduce stress and relapse risk.
What does co-regulation mean?
Co-regulation is when a regulated adult helps a child manage and regulate their emotions through connection, support, and modeling.
What is an I-statement, and how can it help with communication?
An I-statement communicates your feelings, needs, or concerns without blaming the other person. Example: "I feel overwhelmed when plans change without notice, and I need more communication."
Why can asking for help be an important part of recovery and parenting?
Asking for help can reduce isolation, provide practice support, increase accountability, and help a parent manage stress without relying on substances.
What is one of the most effective ways for a parent to reinforce a child's positive behavior?
(multiple answers accepted) Specific praise. For example, saying "I noticed you shared your toy with your sister, that was very kind." Rather than just saying good job.
Name two ways substance use can affect a parent-child relationship.
Possible answers: decreased trust, inconsistent parenting, conflict, difficulty being emotionally available, financial stress, disrupted routine, or difficulty meetings children's needs.
Give two examples of ways a parent can model emotional regulation for their child.
Examples: naming emotions, taking deep breaths, calmly communicating frustration, taking a break, apologizing after losing one's temper, or demonstrating problem-solving.
Name two ways a parent can communicate a limit while still validating a child's feelings.
Examples: "I understand you're angry, and the answer is still no"; validating the feeling while maintaining the limit; calmly explaining the expectation; or offering an appropriate alternative.
A mother has had a difficult day with her children and begins thinking, "I'm a terrible mom, so what's the point?" What is one healthier thought she could practice instead?
Possible answers: "I'm struggling right now, but that doesn't make me a bad mom"; "I can make mistakes and repair them"; or "One difficult day doesn't define me as a parent."
A child is having a tantrum because they are told they cannot have a toy. Should a parent immediately give them the toy to stop the tantrum? Why or why not?
Generally no. Giving the toy in response to the tantrum can unintentionally reinforce the behavior.
A mother is feeling overwhelmed and notices an urge to use. Name three recovery-based steps she could take before acting on the urge.
Possible answers: pause and identify the urge; practice deep breathing/grounding; leave the triggering situation; call a sponsor/support person; attend a meeting; use an urge-surfing skill; identify what triggered the urge; or reach out to a treatment provider.
A child is having a tantrum while the parent is already stressed. What are three things the parent can do to regulate themselves before responding?
Possible answers: take several deep breaths; pause before responding; identify their own emotion; lower their voice; ground themselves; take a brief break if the child is safe; remind themselves that the child's behavior is not an emergency; or seek support.
A family member repeatedly undermines a mother's recovery by using substances around her or encouraging her to use. What is one healthy boundary she could communicate?
Example: "I care about our relationship, but I won't spend time with you when substances are being used around me. If that happens, I will leave."
A mother misses an important parenting responsibility because she was struggling with a recovery related issue. What are three steps she could take to repair the situation and move forward?
Possible answers: acknowledge what happened, take responsibility without excessive shame, apologize or repair with the child if appropriate, identify what contributed to the situation, make a plan to prevent it from happening again, and reach out for recovery/parenting support.
A 4-year-old hits their sibling when they are angry. What are three things a parent should do in response?
Set a clear limit, help the child regulate, and teach an alternative behavior. For example: "I won't let you hit. Hitting hurts. You're angry, let's take a breath and use words to tell your brother what you need."