What
“After a breakup, you immediately start dating someone new without really processing the last relationship. You tell yourself that the previous relationship never mattered top you.”
Answer: Denial
Healthier? “Give yourself space to grieve and reflect before jumping into something new.”
After a tough group session, you leave saying, ‘Everyone else is way more messed up than me.’”
Answer: Projection or Denial
Healthier? “Notice what came up for you in group—journaling or talking to a peer might help process it.”
“You miss a dose of medication and then tell yourself, ‘I can manage without it—I feel fine now.’”
Answer: Denial or Minimization
Healthier? “Even when feeling okay, meds can help keep things steady. Consider checking in with your doctor.”
“You feel angry at your voices but yell at your roommate instead.”
Answer: Displacement
Healthier? “Pause and try grounding—maybe write down what you’re feeling or talk to staff before reacting.”
“You constantly help others with their problems but never talk about your own.”
Answer: Altruism (can be healthy or avoidant)
Healthier? “Helping is great—but check in with your own needs too. Sharing can be healing.”
“You feel rejected after a friend doesn’t call you back, so you say, ‘I never liked them anyway.’”
Answer: Intellectualization
What’s healthier? “I feel hurt—I could journal or talk to someone I trust.”
“You feel down, so you crack a joke: ‘Well, at least my depression has great timing!’”
Answer: Humor (Healthy)
Why it works: Acknowledges reality, softens the moment without denying feelings.
“You get scared of being judged in group, so you don’t talk and pretend you’re fine.”
Answer: Avoidance or Suppression
Healthier? “Maybe say, ‘I’m not ready to talk, but I want to listen today.’”
“You feel sad but tell everyone you’re feeling great, with a big smile.”
Answer: Reaction Formation
Healthier? “Try saying, ‘I’m okay, but it’s been a rough day.’”
“You hear a voice and joke, ‘Oh, there goes my unpaid roommate again.’”
Answer: Humor (Healthy, Adaptive)
Why it works: Defuses tension without denying the experience.
“After a frustrating meeting, you go home and cook a big meal.”
Answer: Sublimation (Healthy)
What’s happening? Turning stress into something useful or nurturing
“You feel ashamed after an outburst, so you say, ‘I’m just a terrible person.’”
Answer: Self-blame or Regression
Healthier? “Notice the mistake, take responsibility, and talk it through.”
“You feel embarrassed after missing a group, so you blame the bus, the weather, and your shoes.”
Answer: Externalization/ displacement
Healthier? “Try saying: ‘I had a rough morning, and I didn’t make it. I’ll try again.’”
“You feel hopeless, so you decide to focus on helping a friend with their groceries or chores.”
Answer: Altruism (Healthy)
Why it works: Giving support while staying connected to others.
“You miss three appointments and say, ‘I didn’t really need them anyway.’”
Answer: Rationalization / Denial
Healthier? “Acknowledge: ‘I was nervous about going. Maybe I need support getting there.’”
“You’re worried about your health, but you keep saying, ‘It’s no big deal,’ and avoid appointments.”
Answer: Denial or Avoidance
Healthier? “Talking to someone or setting a small goal like making one call.”
“You tell your peer worker all about a trauma in detail, but with no emotion, just facts.”
Answer: Intellectualization
Healthier? “Adding feeling words or allowing space to pause and reflect emotionally.”
“You get frustrated in group and storm out without saying anything.”
Answer: Acting out or Regression
Healthier? “Ask for a break, or say: ‘I need a few minutes.’”
“You hear a voice and joke, ‘Oh, there goes my unpaid roommate again.’”
Answer: Humor (Healthy, Adaptive)
Why it works: Defuses tension without denying the experience.
“You get mad but tell yourself, ‘It’s not worth the energy today—I’ll deal with it when I’m calmer.’”
Answer: Suppression (Healthy)
Why it works: Puts things aside consciously, not ignoring—just timing it better.
“You get anxious, so you start organizing your room, folding clothes, and sorting books.”
Answer: Sublimation or Obsessive Coping (context matters)
Healthier? If helpful: Keep it. If not: Try mindfulness or check-in.
“You have a big appointment coming up, and you feel nervous, but you say, ‘It’ll be fine—I’m just being dramatic.’”
Answer: Minimization / Reaction Formation
Healthier? “Validate the fear. Maybe write out what’s making you nervous.”
“You feel anxious but decide to take deep breaths and focus on something grounding, like your feet on the floor.”
Answer: Healthy coping / Mindfulness / Suppression (in a positive way)
Why it works: Acknowledges emotion without being overwhelmed by it.
“You feel upset at staff, so you tell another group member it’s their fault you’re angry.”
Answer: Projection
Healthier? “Notice the feeling and bring it to staff respectfully or talk it out after group.”
“You’re upset about not getting a promotion, but you tell yourself it must have been rigged anyway.”
Answer: Rationalization/ denial
Healthier? “Acknowledge the disappointment and reflect on what could be learned or improved.”