True or False
T/F: A trauma is an upsetting/confusing event that can cause people to feel afraid, upset or helpless.
True
Is it OK for people to get angry? What are healthy ways to show anger? What are unhealthy ways?
Yes! Healthy ways: taking a walk, talking it out, punching a pillow, listening to music, taking a break, etc.
Unhealthy ways: hurting someone or hurting yourself, throwing things, saying hurtful things to others, breaking things, etc.
What is grief?
Grief is a reaction to someone dying, but it's also the name we give to the process of coping with the loss of someone who has died.
Grief is a healthy and normal process of feeling comforted, coming to terms with a loss, and finding ways to adapt.
Getting over grief doesn't mean forgetting about a person who has died.
What makes you feel loved and cared for?
Discuss
T/F: When something reminds a person of an upsetting/confusing event, they may feel strong reactions in their bodies like their heart beating fast, their stomach aching or feeling shaky.
TRUE: These are all typical reactions people can have in our bodies when they think about a traumatic event
Name 3 ways you can calm yourself down when you're feeling upset.
Discuss.
What is a traumatic death?
When someone dies either accidentally or intentionally (on purpose) unexpectedly. This can be because of a car accident, illness, family violence, community violence, drug overdose, a house fire or a natural disaster.
Name 3 things you like about your family
Discuss and share
T/F: A lot of people feel like they DON’T want to talk about or think about the upsetting/confusing thing that happened, but the memories pop into their minds anyway.
TRUE: This is one of the reactions that people can have to traumas. We call it "intrusion" which means that there are still parts of the upsetting/confusing thing that happened to you that are still bothering you. Together we are going to work on this to help you feel better.
Sometimes people find it hard to talk about someone they loved dying unexpectedly. Why might be hard to talk about it?
The person worries that no one will understand or help them, or that people will be mean and blame them or their loved one for dying
The person feels embarrassed and/or thinks that the death of the loved one is somehow their fault
Talking about/thinking about the death brings up bad memories and upsetting feelings. The person may worry that if they start to cry or get really mad that it will hurt really bad and they won't be able to calm themselves down.
The person thinks they're not supposed to talk about it or should keep it a secret
The person doesn't want to upset other people and wants to protect their loved ones from hurt feelings
The person may worry that talking about it will bring about more problems to them or their family
If a person was young when someone they loved died unexpectedly and they don't remember it, can it still be a trauma? Why is it bothering them if they don't remember being there?
It doesn't matter if a person remembers the details of what happened when their loved one died. They can still experience it as something traumatic. Thoughts and feelings that a person might have about the loss of their loved one can still be bothering them a lot. Learning about trauma and grief in therapy can help!
Discuss and share
T/F: It’s not a trauma, or an upsetting/confusing event for me, if I don’t remember all the details.
FALSE. You don’t have to remember all the details of what happened for it to be a trauma.
What are some of the ways a trauma can affect a person?
Share and discuss.
-Trouble paying attention
-Always watching out for danger
-Hard to fall asleep or stay asleep
-Thinking and feeling differently about people and the world around you
T/F: A trauma is an upsetting/confusing event that can cause people to feel afraid, upset or helpless.
True.
Name one thing you like about coming to therapy, and one thing you don't like.
Share and discuss.
T/F: My brother and I experienced the same traumatic event. It doesn’t bother him the way it bothers me. I must be making a big deal out of nothing.
FALSE: The important thing to remember about traumatic events is that we all experience them in different ways. For some people, it changes the way they feel in their body, for others, it changes the way they think about themselves, the world or the people around them. This is all normal and ok!
What kinds of events can be traumatic for a person?
Share and discuss.
-A car crash
-You or someone close to you being seriously hurt or injured
C-Someone you love dying unexpectedly
What are some things people can do to remember and honor their loved one who died? Think of as many as you can!
-They can talk about the person, share stories, look at their picture, make a memory box of their keepsakes
-They can do special things on holidays or on the person’s birthday, or remember them every year on the day they died
-They can visit the person’s gravesite at the cemetery, or light a candle in their honor
-They can do something the loved one liked to do, like sing their favorite song, eat their favorite food, play their favorite game, do their favorite dance, etc.
-They can do something to help others in honor of the person who died
-They can talk to someone they trust, such as a family member, teacher or therapist about how they feel about their loved one.
What's something you're good at?
Share and discuss