Coping Skills
This is the term for the false belief that if you ignore a problem long enough, it will go away on its own.
What is avoidance or denial? (Discussion: How does avoidance actually make problems worse over time?)
What two-letter word is a complete sentence and needs no explanation?
What is "No"? (Discussion: Why is it so hard to say "no" without explaining or apologizing?)
What do we call the harsh inner voice that criticizes you more than you'd ever speak to a friend?
What is the inner critic or negative self-talk? (Discussion: Where do you think that voice originally came from in your life?)
What is the most basic skill you need before you can manage your emotions or understand others?
What is self-awareness? (Knowing and recognizing your own emotions as they happen.
Discussion: How easy or hard is it for you to identify what you're feeling in the moment?)
This common animal is physically unable to jump.
What is a cow?
How many minutes does it take for your body to calm down after you get really angry?
What is 20 minutes? (The anger chemical reaction lasts about 90 seconds, but full physical arousal takes about 20 minutes to return to normal. Discussion: What helps you get through those 20 minutes without making things worse?)
What do we call it when family members are so close that no one has their own identity or space?
What is enmeshment? (When boundaries are so blurred that people feel responsible for each other's feelings and can't be individuals.
Discussion: What's the difference between being close to someone and being enmeshed with them?)
What do we call it when you accuse others of feeling something that you're actually feeling yourself?
What is projection? (A defense mechanism where you see in others what you can't admit in yourself.
Discussion: Why is it sometimes easier to see faults in others than in ourselves?)
What ability are you using when you resist doing something you want now because you know it's better to wait?
What is self-control, impulse control, or delaying gratification? (Discussion: What's something you wish you had more self-control with?)
This food never expires and has been found edible in ancient tombs.
What is honey?
What is it called when you deal with stress by doing something healthy like exercise, but you start doing it so much it becomes a problem itself?
What is over-reliance on one coping skill or using a healthy coping skill in an unhealthy way? (Examples: exercising so much you get injured, working so hard to distract yourself that you burn out, being so independent you won't accept help.
Discussion: Can you think of a time when something good for you became too much?)
If someone gets really angry the first time you set a boundary with them, what does that tell you?
What is that you've challenged their expectations or that they benefited from you having no boundaries? (Their anger shows they don't want the relationship to change.
Discussion: Why do people sometimes react so strongly when we start setting limits?)
What happens in your brain when you name your emotions out loud, like saying "I feel anxious"?
What is it activates the logical brain and calms down the emotional brain? (Naming emotions literally reduces their intensity. This is called "affect labeling."
Discussion: Why do you think putting feelings into words helps us feel better?)
What happens when you try to hide or stuff down your emotions around other people?
What is the emotions get stronger and other people feel your tension anyway? (Suppressed emotions "leak out" through body language and tone, often making others feel uncomfortable.
Discussion: Why do you think people can sense our emotions even when we try to hide them?)
Humans share about 60% of their DNA with this fruit.
What is a banana?
What's the difference between a coping skill that distracts you temporarily and one that actually helps you avoid dealing with the problem?
What is healthy distraction versus avoidance? (Healthy distraction: taking a walk to calm down before a difficult conversation. Avoidance: always watching TV instead of addressing relationship problems.
Discussion: How do you know when you're taking a healthy break versus running away from something?)
What is it called when you say "yes" to avoid conflict, then feel angry and act passive-aggressive later?
What is self-abandonment or self-betrayal? (The resentment comes from betraying your own needs in the moment.
Discussion: What does your resentment usually try to tell you about needs you're not honoring?)
What do we call the things about you that everyone else can see but you can't see about yourself?
What are blind spots? (Patterns others notice but you're unaware of.
Discussion: How do you react when someone points out something about you that you didn't realize?)
what's the key difference between empathy and sympathy?
What is empathy feels WITH someone while sympathy feels FOR someone? (Empathy: "I understand, I've been there." Sympathy: "That's too bad, I feel sorry for you."
Discussion: Which one makes you feel more understood when you're struggling?)
This planet rains diamonds… probably.
What is Neptune?
What happens in your body when you try to push down or ignore your emotions for a long time?
What is they come out in other ways—physical symptoms, outbursts, depression, or illness? (Suppressed emotions don't disappear; they often show up as headaches, stomach problems, fatigue, or sudden explosions.
Discussion: Where in your body do you feel stress or emotions when you try to ignore them?)
What do people with healthy boundaries believe about other people's feelings when they set limits?
What is that others can handle disappointment or that others are responsible for their own emotions? (Healthy boundary-setters don't take responsibility for managing other people's reactions.
Discussion: Who in your life makes you feel most responsible for their happiness? How does that affect you?)
Why do the things that bother us most about other people often reflect something we don't like about ourselves?
What is because we're most sensitive to traits we're trying to deny or hide in ourselves? (When something in someone else triggers a strong reaction, it often touches on something we struggle with too.
Discussion: Think of someone who really irritates you—what specific trait bothers you? Do you ever show that trait yourself?)
According to relationship research, how many positive interactions do you need for every one negative interaction to keep a relationship healthy?
What is 5 positive for every 1 negative (5:1 ratio)? (Below this ratio, relationships tend to fail.
Discussion: How does this apply to the way you talk to yourself—is your self-talk mostly positive or mostly negative?)
This everyday item was invented in 1974 and was originally called the “Rubber Duck.”
What is a USB flash drive?