Using "I" Statements
What word should you start with when expressing your feelings?
"I" (as in "I feel frustrated when...")
What should you do with your eyes when someone is talking to you?
Look at them / Make eye contact
Give me one thing you can do to calm down when you're frustrated.
Take deep breaths, count to 10, go for a walk, listen to music, drink water, take a break, etc.
What are the magic words you should use when asking an adult for help?
"Please" and "Thank you"
Is yelling at an adult an example of respectful communication? Yes or no?
No
I'm going to say a sentence. You tell me if it's a good "I" statement or not: "You never listen to me!"
No, it's not a good "I" statement. A better one would be: "I feel frustrated when I don't think you're hearing what I'm saying."
True or False: It's okay to interrupt an adult if you think of something important while they're talking.
False
Tell me one physical sign that shows you're getting frustrated.
Clenched fists, tight chest, hot face, fast heartbeat, tension in shoulders, raised voice
You don't understand your homework. Tell me a respectful way to ask your teacher for help
Raise your hand, explain what you don't understand, and ask if they can help you understand it.
What does it mean to use a "respectful tone"? Describe it.
Speaking calmly, not yelling, not being sarcastic, and using polite language.
Let me give you two options. Which is a better "I" statement? A) "I'm upset because you're mean." B) "I feel hurt when my feelings aren't considered."
B
Give me two things you should do to show you're listening to an adult.
Any two of: Make eye contact, nod your head, don't interrupt, ask questions, put your phone away, face them
Why is it important to calm down BEFORE talking to an adult when you're frustrated?
So you can communicate clearly, think more clearly, avoid saying things you regret, and have a better conversation.
True or False: It's a sign of weakness to ask an adult for help when you're frustrated.
False
You're upset, but you want to communicate respectfully. Should you use sarcasm? Tell me yes or no and why.
No, because sarcasm can hurt feelings and make the other person defensive instead of understanding.
Imagine you got a bad grade on something you worked really hard on. Tell me an "I" statement you could say to your teacher about how you feel.
"I feel disappointed because I put effort into that assignment, and I'd like to understand what I can improve."
Tell me in your own words: What does "active listening" mean?
Paying full attention to what someone is saying and showing them you understand (through eye contact, nodding, asking questions, etc.)
Picture this: You're about to explode with anger. What's a healthy way to take a break from the situation?
Ask to take a break, leave the room calmly, take time to cool down before talking, or use a calming strategy.
Your parent is busy, but you need help. What should you do?
Ask when they have time, wait patiently, or explain why you need help soon in a respectful way.
I'm going to say something in a disrespectful way. You tell me how you could say it respectfully instead. Here's the disrespectful version: "FINE! Whatever! You never believe me anyway!"
"I'm frustrated right now, but I'd like to talk about this when we're both calm."
Why is using "I" statements better than using "you" statements when you're frustrated? Explain your thinking.
Because "I" statements focus on your feelings instead of blaming the other person, which helps them listen better instead of getting defensive.
Imagine you're frustrated with your parent, but they're trying to explain their side of the story. How can you listen to them even when you disagree?
Focus on understanding their perspective, ask clarifying questions, avoid interrupting, or remind yourself that listening doesn't mean you agree.
Tell me the difference between reacting when you're frustrated and responding after you've calmed down.
Reacting means acting immediately without thinking (often saying hurtful things); responding means taking time to calm down and then communicating thoughtfully.
Why is it important to ask for help instead of staying frustrated and keeping it inside? Explain your thinking.
Because asking for help allows adults to support you, prevents problems from getting worse, and teaches you good communication skills.
How does your tone of voice affect whether an adult will listen to you when you're frustrated? Explain the connection.
A calm, respectful tone makes adults more likely to listen and help; a disrespectful tone makes them defensive and less willing to listen.