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I Statements
False Relationship Beliefs
More False Relationship Beliefs
Self-Care
Definitions
100
I use an "I statement when."
When a person feels that they are being blamed—whether rightly or wrongly—it’s common that they respond with defensiveness
100
"I am always wrong: the other person is always right"
A healthier relationship belief is to "seek understanding and solution Not blame."
100
"It's better to be with someone destructive than to be alone."
What is "It's better to be alone than in a bad relationship."
100
What is the definition of having good self-care?
To be able to care for your own needs in life
100
Over time, DISRESPECTFUL communication builds up ______________ in a relationship.
What is CONTEMPT, which is a buildup of disregard and inability/unwillingness to give the other person the benefit of the doubt
200
How to set up an "I Statement"
What is “I feel {emotion word} when {explanation}.”
200
"I should hide what I think and feel."
What is "in a healthy relationship, ANYTHING can be talked about."
200
"Good Relationships are easy"
What is "A good relationship requires work, and is worth it."
200
The need "TO LIVE" includes these kinds of needs...
What is food, shelter, money, warmth, physical health, etc.
200
Define ANGER.
What is an EMOTION that lets you know something is going on that you do not like, and it gives you energy to do something about it.
300
Use and "I statement" in this scenario. A friend always cancels plans at the last minute. Recently, you were waiting for them at a restaurant, when they called to say they couldn’t make it
What is "I feel unimportant and neglected when you cancel plans at the last minute."
300
"The other person has to change"
What is "the best way to change a relationship is by changing MY behavior."
300
"I must take care of everyone first; my needs come last"
What is "I need relationships in which both people's needs are respected."
300
What does it mean to feeling important as a method of self-care?
It means you are able to feel you are good at something, have value to others, have value in yourself, and are able to contribute to something beyond or bigger than yourself.
300
Define RESPECT.
What is where you are willing and able to listen to and care about someone's thoughts, opinions and emotions.
400
The goal of an i statement.
To define a problem, take responsibility for your emotion and to gently describe how the other person’s actions affect you.
400
"Bad relationships are all I can get."
What is "creating a good relationship is a skill to learn, just like playing a sport."
400
"I must be liked by everyone"
What is "I need to cultivate relationships with a few people who really matter."
400
What does it mean to have VARIETY as a form of self-care?.
What is to have fun, to be able to enjoy things and not allow them to get stale and boring, to constantly challenge oneself. Examples might be to study something you enjoy, choosing a career that you like, finding your interests and goals in life.
400
Define RESPONSIBILITY.
What is Taking ownership for things you have done that have hurt others, and/or having a certain assigned duty or task to complete or follow through on
500
Create an I statement for the following scenario: Your boss keeps dumping new work on you, with little instruction, and not enough time. Despite working overtime, you’re weeks behind.
What is . . .
500
"I cannot exist without {insert name here}."
What is "While losing a relationship is painful, I can mourn and move on."
500
"I have no value to other people."
What is "With recovery, I can respect myself more and others will too."
500
What does it mean to LOVE AND BE LOVED as a form of self-care?
What is a need to have someone for support and connection - both you supporting and connecting with another person, and that person supporting, caring, and connecting with you. This may be an intimate partner, best friend, family member, classmate, or anyone in your life who values you (or you value them).
500
What is CONTROL (two parts)?
What is 1) Making someone do something they do not want to do AND/OR 2) Keeping someone from doing something they WANT to do