Boundary Basics
What is a personal boundary?
A limit you set for how others can treat you or how you engage with the world.
“I never ask for help, even when I need it.”
Rigid.
True or False: It’s okay if a partner wants your passwords.
False.
How can you say “no” to hanging out without hurting a friend’s feelings?
Thanks for the invite, but I need time to myself today.
Better boundary: “I’m not comfortable with that.” OR “Whatever you want.”
“I’m not comfortable with that.”
True or False: You can have different boundaries with different people.
True
“I tell strangers everything about me.”
Porous.
What’s a red flag: Respecting your space or tracking your location 24/7?
Tracking your location 24/7.
Your parent asks personal questions you’re not ready to answer. What do you say?
“I’m not ready to talk about that right now.”
Who sets boundaries: You or others?
You do!
Why are boundaries important in relationships?
They keep relationships respectful, safe, and balanced.
“I say no when I’m uncomfortable, and I respect others’ no.”
Healthy.
You feel drained after every conversation with a friend. Red flag or not?
Red flag.
A partner wants to text constantly. Script a boundary.
“I care about you, but I need space to focus during the day.”
Is this a boundary or a rule: “Please don’t call me names.”
Boundary.
What happens when you don’t express your boundaries?
You may feel resentful, burnt out, or disrespected.
“I avoid conflict by always agreeing, even when I disagree.”
Porous.
What’s a yellow flag?
A behavior that may not be a full red flag, but is concerning and needs attention.
Friend pressuring you to skip class. How do you respond?
“That’s not something I’m comfortable with. I’m going to class.”
Which is healthy: Ignoring texts for days OR replying with “I need some time to myself”?
“I need some time to myself”
Name the three main types of boundary styles.
Rigid, Porous, Healthy.
“I cut people off immediately when they upset me.”
Rigid.
Name two emotional boundary red flags.
Guilt-tripping, gaslighting, love bombing, etc.
You want to end a toxic friendship. How do you say it?
“I don’t think this friendship is healthy for me anymore. I need space.”
“I said no, but they kept pushing.” What boundary tool should you use next?
Reiterate boundary firmly, or remove yourself from the situation.