You walk into a room that contains a match, a kerosene lamp, a candle, and a fireplace. What do you light first?
The match.
What can you hold in your right hand but never in your left hand?
Your left hand.
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
What has a mouth but never speaks, runs but never walks, and has a bed but never sleeps?
A river.
If I have it, I don’t share it. If I share it, I don’t have it. What is it?
Secret
What comes once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in a thousand years?
The letter "M"
The person who makes it, sells it. The person who buys it never uses it. The person who uses it never knows they are using it. What is it?
A coffin.
If a plane crashes on the border of two countries, where do they bury the survivors?
Nowhere! You don’t bury survivors!
If an electric train is moving north at 100 km/h and the wind is blowing west at 50 km/h, which way does the smoke blow?
Electric trains don’t have smoke!
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel
A rooster lays an egg on top of a roof. Which way does it roll?
Roosters don’t lay eggs.
A man stands on one side of a river, his dog on the other. He calls his dog, who immediately crosses the river without getting wet or using a bridge or boat. How?
The river was frozen.
You can drop me from the tallest building, and I’ll be fine. But if you drop me in water, I die. What am I?
A paper.
I start with "e," end with "e," and have only one letter inside. What am I?
Envelope
What month of the year has 28 days?
All of them.
You see a boat filled with people. It has not sunk, but when you look again, you don’t see a single person. Why?
Because they're married
What disappears as soon as you say its name?
Silence.
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What has many teeth but can’t bite?
Comb
What question can you never answer yes to?
Are you asleep yet?
What has many words but never speaks?
A book.
What can you catch but not throw?
A cold.
What has an eye but cannot see?
A needle
What is always running but never moves?
Time
What invention lets you look right through a wall?
Window.