Horor
A woman shoots her husband, then holds him under water for five minutes. A little while later, they both go out and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?
She shot her husband with a camera and then developed the photo.
Two girls ate dinner together. They both ordered iced tea. One girl drank them very fast and had finished five in the time it took the other to drink just one. The girl who drank one died while the other survived. All of the drinks were poisoned. How is that possible?
The poison was in the ice.
I speak without a mouth and hear without ears. I have no body, but I come alive with wind. What am I?
An Echo
David's father has three sons : Snap, Crackle and _____ ?
David
You can drop me from the tallest building and I'll be fine, but if you drop me in the water I die. What am I?
Paper
A man was found dead with a cassette recorder in one hand and a gun in the other. When the police came in, they immediately pressed the play button on the cassette. He said "I have nothing else to live for. I can't go on," then the sound of a gunshot. After listening to the cassette tape, the police knew that it was not a suicide, but a homicide. How did they know?
If the man shot himself while he was recording, how did he rewind the cassette tape?
On the first day of the school, a young girl was found murdered. Police suspect four male teachers and question them. They were asked what they were doing at 8:00 am. Mr. Walter: I was driving to school and I was late. Mr. Thomas: I was checking English exam papers. Mr. Benjamin: I was reading the newspaper. Mr. Calvin: I was with my wife in my office. The police arrested the killer. How did the police find the murderer?
Mr.Thomas as he cannot be checking exam papers on the first day of school.
You measure my life in hours and I serve you by expiring. I'm quick when I'm thin and slow when I'm fat. The wind is my enemy.
Candle
Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?
Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow.
What is greater than God,
more evil than the devil,
the poor have it,
the rich need it,
and if you eat it, you'll die?
Nothing
A man is found murdered on a Sunday morning. His wife calls the police, who question the wife and the staff, and are given the following alibis: the wife says she was sleeping, the butler was cleaning the closet, the gardener was picking vegetables, the maid was getting the mail, and the cook was preparing breakfast. Immediately, the police arrest the murdered. Who did it and how did the police know?
The maid. There is no mail on Sundays.
Mr. James was found dead in his room. The room had no window and the door was locked. The only 4 people who had a key to the room were questioned.
Sophia the maid: “I came to wake up Mr. James; when I saw him dead, I screamed!”
John the butler: “When I heard the scream, I ran into the room, turned on the light and saw Mr. James with a knife in his neck.”
Sarah the governess: “I rushed up alongside John; when he turned on the light, the room was all bloody.”
Jack the cook: “I was prepping breakfast and didn’t see anything.”
Who did it?
It was Sophia. If the room was dark, she wouldn’t have seen Mr. James lying there — unless she already knew it.
I have cities, but no houses. I have mountains, but no trees. I have water, but no fish. What am I?
map
You live in a one story house made entirely of redwood. What color would the stairs be?
What stairs? You live in a one story house.
Who makes it, has no need of it.
Who buys it, has no use for it.
Who uses it can neither see nor feel it.
What is it?
A coffin
A crime has been committed at Freemont Street. The main suspect is a man named Sean Baker. It was said that a man had been walking along the pathway when he was suddenly shot in the stomach. The suspect had brown hair, blue eyes and wore a baggy Armani suit just like Sean Baker's. Sean was asked to tell the story right from the beginning. "Well," said Sean, "I was just hanging around the park when I saw this man walking along the pathway. Suddenly, a guy came up from behind him and shot him! I ran home as fast as I could. The policemen asked him to give a description of the murderer. "He had a red mustache, red hair and a baggy Armani suit on." "I think this man is telling a lie," said one of the policemen. How did he know?
How can the murderer shoot him in the stomach if he came up behind the man?
A man was shot to death while in his car. There were no powder marks on his clothing which indicated that the gunman was outside the car. However, all the windows were up and the doors locked. After a close inspection was made, the only bullet holes discovered were on the man's body. How was he murdered?
The victim was in a convertible.
What is seen in the middle of March and April that can't be seen at the beginning or end of either month?
The letter "R."
Samuel was out for a walk when it started to rain. He did not have an umbrella and he wasn't wearing a hat. His clothes were soaked, yet not a single hair on his head got wet. How could this happen?
This man is bald!
What 8 letter word can have a letter taken away and it still makes a word. Take another letter away and it still makes a word. Keep on doing that until you have one letter left. What is the word?
The word is starting! starting, staring, string, sting, sing, sin, in, I
The Smith family is a very wealthy family that lives in a big, circular home. One morning, Mr. Smith woke up and found his gardener's body. He knew it was one of his employees who had killed him. So he asked them what they were doing in the morning and he got these replies. Driver: "I was outside washing the car." Maid: "I was dusting the corners of the house." Cook: "I was starting to make lunch for later." From the replies he knew who the killer was. Can you guess who it was?
The maid, because they lived in a circular house and she was apparently "dusting the corners" of the house at the time of the murder - the house is round, therefore it has no corners.
Dodge was staying with Cousin Jamie in Jamie's lakeside cabin. They were setting up Jamie's will. As Dodge was Jamie's closest living relative, much of Jamie's estate was being left to him. One day, Jamie went to Dr Dodge very disturbed. "Doctor," he began, "I have just found out that a man named Georgio wants to get me. He will be here very soon. Where will I go? Where can I hide? If he finds me in here, he will surely kill me. I do not have time to leave this clearing and go farther into the woods." Dr Dodge thought for a moment, and then grabbed a 5' long bamboo pole, with a diameter the size of a quarter. "Jamie, follow me out to the lake. This lake is 4' deep. If you lie on the bottom of the lake and breathe through this pole, Georgio will never find you. I will be in the bulrushes with a shotgun, and I will shoot him when he comes. I will swim down to find you when he is gone." Jamie consented, and lay down on the bottom of the lake with the bamboo pole in his mouth. A few hours later, a ranger passed by. He found Jamie's body, dead. Dr Dodge told the police of the circumstance, and that Jamie had probably panicked, and died. Police arrested Dr Dodge, on the charges of murdering Jamie. Why? The bamboo pole did not have any cracks or holes. Its opening was above water the whole time.
Jamie died of carbon dioxide poisoning. The pole was 5' long, but only the size of a quarter. The first time he breathed in, he breathed oxygen. When he exhaled, the air could not travel 5' before he breathed in again. He was just breathing what he exhaled. Before long, all he was breathing was carbon dioxide. He died of CO2 poisoning. Doctor Doge was the one who told him to use the pole, therefore the cause of his death. Dodge is a DOCTOR, and therefore knows about the CO2. Dodge did murder Jamie. His motive: the money in the will.
You see a boat filled with people. It has not sunk, but when you look again you don't see a single person on the boat. Why?
All the people were married
Five apples are in a basket. How do you divide them among five girls so that each girl gets an apple, but one apple remains in the basket?
Give the fifth girl her apple in the basket.
Which creature walks on four legs in the morning, two legs in the afternoon, and three legs in the evening?
Man. He crawls on all fours as a baby, then walks on two feet as an adult, and then walks with a cane as an old man.