What did the triangle say to the circle?
You're pointless!!
Which kind of fruit must have a large wedding ceremony with lots of people in attendence?
Can't-elope
What kind of room has no door or windows?
A mushroom
What kind of clothes do lawyers wear?
Lawsuits
Why did the football team go to the bank?
To get a quarter back
What did the little lobster get on his math test?
Sea-plus
What did the doctor provide to the sick lemon?
Lemon-aid
What has an eye but can't see anything?
A needle
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he got a whole in one
What do you serve that you can't eat?
A tennis ball
Why is it easier to count cows than sheep?
You can use a cowculator
You cut me up, you chop me up, you dice me up and you cry all over me. What am I?
An onion
What type of house weighs the least?
A lighthouse
The one fashion acccessory farmers and hipsters can agree on.
Suspenders
Why did the ballerina quit?
It was tutu hard
What do math teachers like to eat?
Pi
What do you call a cat who has sprouted fins and loves to swim?
A catfish
Where is the best place to grow a garden in school?
Kindergarten
Why did the leopard wear a striped shirt?
So he wouldn't be spotted
What sport has four letters, is played around the world and starts with a T?
Golf
How do you make the number seven even without addition, subtraction, division or multiplication?
Drop the "S"
What is the wealthiest nut?
Cashew
What has a face but can't smile?
A clock
What clothing does a house wear?
Address
What animal is the best at baseball?
A bat