Self-Nurturing
Define Self-Nurturing
Actions that meet a need (but might feel uncomfortable.)
Define Self-soothing.
Actions that create a nice feeling, or take away a bad feeling.
How would you overcome this barrier to self-care: Feeling guilty or selfish for taking time for yourself
Reframe self-care as maintenance, not indulgence — you can’t pour from an empty cup.
SEEING THE WORST POSSIBLE OUTCOME OF AN EVENT OR SITUATION AND THEN DECIDING THAT IF THIS OUTCOME DOES HAPPEN, THE RESULTS WILL BE A DISASTER. WORRIES BECOME ESCALATED AND THOUGHTS BECOME EXAGERATED.
Catastrophizing
A technique used to challenged and deepens understanding by asking thoughtful open-ended questions.
Socratic Questioning
Name 3 types of self-nourishment.
Going to bed early so you’re rested tomorrow. Opening up to a friend about a problem you’re having. Spending time playing an instrument or writing a poem. Cooking yourself a healthy meal. Scheduling that dentist appointment you’ve been putting off. ETC.
Name 3 types of self-soothing.
Taking a nice bubble bath. Binge watching your favorite TV show. Having an extra helping of ice cream. Hitting that snooze button an extra time (or an extra dozen times). Buying yourself something you want but don’t need. ETC
How would you overcome this barrier to self-care: Lack of time or overwhelming schedule
Start with micro-moments: 2-minute grounding, deep breathing, stretching, or journaling.
Downplaying one's ability to cope with or overcome challenges.
Minimization
“What’s the evidence that this outcome will really happen?”
“If a friend told you this story, what would you say to them?”
Reality Testing / Evidence Check
How might you know you're neglecting self-nourishment?
You feel like your problems are piling up and you need more and more self-soothing to deal with the stress of the unsolved problems. ETC
How might you know you're neglecting self-soothing?
You feel like you’re always “on” and you’re constantly thinking about the next task you need to complete. You interrupt or cancel enjoyable activities in order to complete more “productive” tasks. You find it difficult to know what you’re feeling in any given moment, and find it much easier to identify what would feel productive instead of what would feel pleasant.
How would you overcome this barrier: External stressors (family, work, finances) taking priority
Set small, protected time blocks; communicate boundaries and ask for support when possible.
Focusing on worst-case scenarios and imagining catastrophic outcomes.
What-if thinking
Encourage action toward problem-solving instead of rumination—e.g., making a call, cleaning a small space, journaling gratitude.
Behavioral Activation
What is one way to add more self-nourishment to your life?
Do one thing to take care of your health. Go to bed an hour sooner, exercise for 20 minutes, schedule that doctor’s visit, eat a gosh-darn vegetable – whatever you want. If you pick something and it doesn’t get done, that’s okay (just pick something easier and try again!) ETC
What is one way to add more self-soothing to your life?
Set aside a small monthly budget just for self-soothing. For instance, give yourself $20 per week to spend on a movie, or a bath bomb, or a fancy cheese at the store.
How would you overcome this barrier: Feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start
Make a short list of 3 simple self-care actions you can do today; keep it visible.
Experiencing intense fear, anxiety, or distress in response to perceived threats.
Emotional Intensity
“What if things go right?” or “What if I handle it well?”
→ Builds cognitive flexibility and hope.
Opposite “What-Ifs”
What is one common myth about self-nourishment?
It's selfish, it's expensive and time consuming, I have to earn it... etc
What is one common myth about self-soothing?
Self-soothing is just “babying” myself.
How would you overcome this barrier: Lack of motivation or low energy
Pair self-care with existing habits (listen to calming music in the car, stretch before bed).
What is one effect of catastrophizing
Increased anxiety, impaired problem-solving, avoidant behaviors, impact on relationships, and physical health.
Label the emotion (“I feel anxious”) rather than identifying as it (“I am anxious”).
→ Builds metacognitive awareness (from ACT/DBT mindfulness)
Name it to tame it.