Top of the Podium
A gentleman, an astronaut, and a master of tuna salad? He is only one man. Evan will rate any of his movies 10/10.
Who is Matthew Macchanahahay?
Pitched as a ‘life-changing’ summer opportunity, this hustle has cost Evan friendships by turning conversations into transactions driven by personal gain.
What is "Summer Sales"
Harnessed in gear, suspended at dizzying heights, and occasionally dodging bat guano, this thrill is Evan’s adventure of choice.
What is Rock Climbing?
A tasty dish that we call cake, even though it is baked is definitely NOT a cake, but a pie in disguise.
What is Cheesecake?
Concerts, competitions, tears, flying pens, and smacked hands all marked Evan’s childhood years learning this instrument.
What is the Piano?
Often the "(blank)" of one's eye, this is also Evan's favorite pie
What is Apple?
Nails on chalkboards and scratching records don't bother me. But rub either of these items together and Evan may fly away.
What are balloons or styrofoam?
They’d help a CROOK make a getaway dash, keep your BALANCE, and remind you to JUST DO IT all while you HOKA tight turn. But enough hints; let’s get down to BASICS. Evan prefers to run in this brand of footwear.
What are "Brooks"?
So so sweet, and so so yummy. This combination though detested by many, feels good in Evan's tummy
What is "Pineapple on pizza"
Shivering and cold, Evan lays on a familiar orange couch trying to obtain some rest. This person in this house provided Evan with warmth in the form of a blanket?
Who Is Dave?
Often on repeat, this slap-bass–accompanied group of friends stars in Evan’s favorite sitcom about nothing
What is Seinfeld?
Steak, bacon, and eggs are quite delicious, but when you ditch the need for carbohydrates and call it this, Evan feels quite vicious.
What is the Keto Diet?
Going faster than fast and twisting and turning on a roller coaster, Evan thought, ‘This is the worst,’ as one of his accessory digestive organs began to burst.
What is "the appendix"?
Evan would die on the hill that parking lot etiquette requires doing this before driving away.
What is returning your shopping cart?
Because of a chunky build, a round belly, and an unbothered attitude, Evan was nicknamed after this enlightened figure as a kid.
Who is Buddha?
From the streets of Gotham to beyond space and time, this composer, famous for Batman and Interstellar, also scores Evan’s epic study sessions
Who is Hanz Zimmer?
People who refer to themselves this way have Evan feeling quite squirrely. Often reducing their entire personality to a love of a treat or activity. This term commonly takes the form of a "______ ______"
What is a (blank) Girly?
Evan's childhood soccer team once wore the color of the sky. Unbeknownst to the children, they named their team after a toot.
What is a "Blue Dart"?
Evan would die on the hill that this is more tolerable than the humidity in the South.
What is Arizona heat?
Scared by the invisible and hopeful to overcome his fear, young Evan imagined himself a hero with this name oft used to describe a smelly phenomenon.
Who is "The Wind Breaker"?
Pernicious partisans? no thats not it. No good neighbors? Still no. Despicable denizen? Its on the tip of my tongue...
this is Evan’s favorite spooky video game series, famous for zombies and very terrible movies
What is Resident Evil?
This sensation he cannot stand, must be removed immediately from Evan's hands.
What is Sticky?
Once a 215 lb lad, Evan equipped shoulder pads and played this position on the 100 yard field.
What is a Defensive Lineman?
According to Evan, this franchise should have stopped after its original triumphs instead of endlessly expanding its universe.
What is star wars?
Thwack! then all he saw was black. This family member knocked Evan upside the head with a baseball bat.
Who is Lindsay?