Perspective Taking
Why is it important to be aware of our own facial expressions and body language?
Also, even if you are not interested in a topic that someone else is talking about, you should try your best to act interested (i.e. smile, face the person, maintain eye contain). This helps you make and keep friends and you may even learn something new!
Act out an emotion and have your team guess what it is by looking at your facial expressions and body language.
Answers may vary.
Describe 3 qualities you look for in a friend. What are 3 qualities you possess that make you a good friend?
Answers may vary.
A friend is someone who:
Is kind and respectful to you
Shares interests with you
Looks forward to talking with you
Care about your feelings
Sticks up for you when others are around
Why is it important to have positive self-esteem?
It helps us manage our thoughts and emotions and tackle small problems by reducing our stress or frustration
Self-esteem helps us try new things (i.e. a new sport, make a new friend, join a group).
Having positive thoughts helps us have confidence in who we are and helps us get through challenging times.
It is important for each of us to feel good about ourselves and proud of our accomplishments. Having positive self-esteem also helps us feel more comfortable which allows others to feel happy and comfortable around us too.
People won’t want to spend time with us if we have negative thoughts and complain all the time!
What clues can we use to tell if someone is interested in having a conversation with us?
It’s important to observe the other person’s facial expressions and body language to figure out if they are interested in speaking with you
Ex: If their body is turned away from you or they give you a very short, one worded reply they may not be interested in speaking at the moment
What are the 2 steps to showing empathy?
1. First, we need to figure out how the person is feeling.
We do this by reading someone’s facial expressions and listening to their tone of voice.
Then, we can match their actions with how they are feeling.
Hint: we do this by putting ourselves in the other person’s shoes
2.
Second, we take action! Show them you understand!
We can do or say something to show the other person that we understand how they are feeling and we want them to feel better.
We can ask questions or make comments to show them that we want to know more about their feelings. Examples:
How are you feeling about that?
That must have been really hard.
We can also tell about a time when we have felt that way. Examples:
I get how you feel.
I hate when that happens to me.
Tell us about a small, medium, and big problem that you have experienced. Why is it important to match our reaction size to the size of the problem?
Small problems are things we experience everyday. They can make us feel frustrated or annoyed.
Small problems are ones you can fix yourself and no one is in danger
We should have small reactions to small problems!
Examples of small reactions: walk away, fix it on your own, ignore it, choose a calm down strategy
Small problems usually require quick and simple solutions. We can usually solve small problems ourselves!
We can experience medium problems often. They can make us feel angry, hurt, or embarrassed.
Medium problems are ones that usually require the help of a friend or adult, and there’s no immediate danger
We should have medium reactions to these problems!
Examples of medium reactions: ask for help from a friend or adult, remove yourself from the situation, take a break
Sometimes, we can experience big problems. They can make us feel very angry, shocked, scared, or anxious.
Big problems are ones that require help from an adult right away, and someone may be in danger
We can have big reactions to these problems!
Big problems require big solutions! We can quickly get a teacher, yell for an adult, run away, or call 9-1-1.
Remember why it’s important for the reaction to match the size, so that you can get the appropriate help and make others around you feel comfortable.
There are 6 levels on the friendship pyramid. As we move up the pyramid, our relationships grow stronger and closer. What is something you can do to move up the friendship pyramid and build your friendship with someone?
You can climb up the pyramid with time! Building friendships takes time and effort. We can spend time with friends, make plans to hang out with them, and learn about common interests.
Name 2 ways you can boost your self-esteem if you are feeling down or feeling like you aren't good at something.
Spend time with people who like you and care about you.
Ignore (and stay away from) people who put you down or treat you badly.
Do things that you enjoy or that make you feel good.
Do things you are good at.
Reward yourself for your successes.
Be your own best friend - treat yourself well and do things that are good for you.
Make good choices for yourself, and don't let others make your choices for you.
Take responsibility for yourself, your choices, and your actions.
Always do what you believe is right.
Be true to yourself and your values.
Respect other people and treat them right.
Set goals and work to achieve them.
Why do we have conversation with others?
It helps build friendships!
You can learn new things about your friends and the world
Listening to and talking with friends makes them feel good
When your friends feel good, your friendships stay strong
When you learn about each other, your friendships grow deeper
What do you think is happening in this picture with two boys. After looking at the full picture, do you see things differently?
Answers will vary. Possible answer with partial photo: It looks like the boy is pushing someone down.
Whole image: The boy is protecting him from getting hit by a bus.
Step 1: Think about how your body is feeling
Step 2: Decide what your body is telling you it needs right now.
Step 3: Take the steps you need to get back in control.
Think about a time when you were arguing with a friend because you both wanted to do different things. How could you have compromised and found a win-win solution?
Answers will vary.
When something gets really hard, we might feel like giving up. What can we do if we feel like giving up on something?
We can use positive self-talk by changing negative thoughts to positive thoughts.
Remind yourself you can do it
Think of how good it will feel once you achieve your goal
Remember that with practice you will get better
Take a break and then come back to it with fresh eyes
Ask for help - it’s okay to ask for help when we need it!
Know that everyone feels this way (they want to quit/give up) at some point in their life. It’s normal! You need to find what strategy works for you to keep you motivated.
Remember why you set the goal in the first place so you have motivation to help you keep going.
How can we figure out what other people are interested in talking about? Why should we talk about things that other people like?
To figure out other people's interests, we can look for clues.
We can listen to the things they talk about or observe them.
If we share interests with another person, we can talk about these interests.
Shared interests are a great way to start conversations and get to know other people
This shows others that we care about talking to them and have an interest in having a conversation with them.
What do you think is happening in this picture of a girl. After looking at the full picture, do you see things differently?
Before: Looks like she is coloring on the walls.
After: She is cleaning up the baby's mess.
How can we "change the channel" on tough emotions?
1. Determine how we are feeling
2. Think of what you can do to calm down
3. Change the channel and think positive thoughts. Think about something that makes you happy or proud.
One way to use positive self-talk is saying a phrase to yourself in your head.
Use ”I” phrases (i.e. “I can do this”, or “I will get it next time”).
You can also say phrases like “It’s not a big deal,” or “I can try to figure this out.”
You can also remind yourself of things you are great at (i.e.“Everyone loses sometimes, I know I’m good at this and I can tryagain next time.”).
Abby and her parents were trying to decide what to do for the weekend.
Abby wanted to go to the theater and watch a movie, but her parents were tired and wanted to stay home. They decided to watch a movie at home.
What kind of solution is this? Win-win? Win-lose? Lose-win? Lose-lose?
Why are win-win solutions important?
Win-win
"Win-win” solutions are important because they help us handle conflicts with friends by thinking about others and looking for ways to make both people in a conflict happy.
What is a short-term goal you want to accomplish this summer? What steps can you take to reach that goals?
Answers will vary.
Name two types of thoughts we should keep in our head ("think it") and things we can say out loud ("say it").
THINK IT:
Insults
Negative comments about ourselves and others
Extra details about a story or experience
Opinions in a disrespectful way
Curse words or mean words
Touching others or chasing other
SAY IT:
Helpful thoughts
Positive comments about ourselves and others
Opinions in a respectful way (e.g. instead of “that’s stupid” you could say “I don’t really agree because…”)
Compliments about ourselves and others
General questions
Just the right amount of information
Key Ideas from a Story or Experience
Handshaking after playing a game
Hugging a family member or friend