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Understanding You and Your Teen (CH 1)
Change Your Response to Your Teen (CH 2)
Communicate Respect and Encourage
(CH 3)
Encourage Cooperation and Solving Problems (CH 4)
Use Consequences
Build Responsibility
(CH 5)
100
This type of parenting balances RIGHTS and RESPONSIBILITIES and it aims to help teens become responsible by: 1)Showing respect 2)Giving opportunities to make decisions (PG 5)
What is democratic/authoritative style parenting
100
Taking a bubble bath, reading a mystery novel, going to bible study, going to mexico, watching a Pat's game.......are all example of THIS
What are examples of self care activities/ways to take care of yourself
100
If you DO these 3 things: 1) tell what is happening 2) tell what you feel 3) explain why you feel that way What type of MESSAGE are you using? (PG 50)
What is an I-MESSAGE
100
THIS is an encouraging way to solve problems. THIS is used when you take the time to listen, talk and agree about a way to solve a problem......there are five steps involved......... (PG 76)
What is EXPLORING ALTERNATIVES
100
This STYLE of relationship includes THREATENING, YELLING, PUTDOWNS (PG 91)
What is PUNISHMENT
200
If you ask yourself the following questions what are you trying to figure out?? 1) Are my rights being disrespected 2) Could anybody get hurt 3) Is someone's property threatened 4) Is my teen unable to take this responsibility (PG 11)
Who owns the problem
200
1) Mom/Dad feels HURT and EXTREMELY ANGRY 2) Mom/Dad wants to "get back" at teen so they tell him he can't go to the school dance 3) Teen HURTS Mom/Dad again by ruining the patio The goal of the teen's misbehavior is...... (PG 26)
What is REVENGE
200
When you use this SKILL you are helping your teen grow in self esteem and teaching your teen to appreciate their own special qualities, to feel capable, and to feel worthwhile......... (PG 54&60)
What is ENCOURAGMENT
200
No matter who owns the problem exploring alternatives has five steps: 1) UNDERSTANDING the problem 2) 3) DISCUSS the ideas 4) CHOOSE an idea 5) USE the idea What is the missing step............... (PG 76)
What is BRAINSTORMING ideas to solve the problem
200
This parenting technique includes helping your teen: 1) take charge of their own lives by making decisions 2) to learn from the consequences of their choices (PG 92)
What is DISCIPLINE
300
If you are feeling ANNOYED your TEEN is seeking...... (pg 12)
What is ATTENTION
300
You use this SKILL when you are being a "good listener". You listen to what your teen says and IN YOUR OWN WORDS YOU REPEAT what you think your teen feels and says. You are kind of like a mirror that REFLECTS your teen's feelings. (PG 39)
What is REFLECTIVE LISTENING
300
Using this style of parenting OFTEN teaches your teen they must PLEASE OTHERS, to doubt themselves, to see things as a contest and to learn one person can be "better than" someone else.....(PG 59)
What is PRAISE
300
When talking with your teen you will ask questions. There are two TYPES of questions, OPEN and CLOSED. Which TYPE of question makes it easier for your teen to respond with a one word answer ........ (PG 77)
What is a CLOSED QUESTION
300
Your teen goes to bed late and is tired when he gets up for school in the morning for school........your teen is experiencing a consequence, is this a logical or natural consequence? (PG 93)
What is a NATURAL CONSEQUENCE
400
If you are feeling ANGRY your teen is seeking POWER what is the "flip side" of this goal of misbehavior? (PG 22)
What is INDEPENDENCE
400
Give 3 personal examples of something POSITIVE about your teen
OPEN ANSWER
400
Your teen is 2 hours late for curfew, he did not call, you have been up waiting and you are getting worried, angry and scared. When he gets home you are going to communicate how you are feeling with an I-MESSAGE......What would you say? (PG 50)
When you don't call..... I feel worried...... because I don't know where you are.
400
When talking about problems using open ended questions invite your teen to keep talking, they show respect and that you want to listen........what are the "6 KEY" words to begin open ended questions.........HINT: 5 begin with the letter "W" (PG 77)
Where When What Who Which How
400
Some consequences need to be created, these are called ________ consequences (PG 94)
What is LOGICAL
500
1) ATTENTION 2) POWER 3) 4) DISPLAYING INADEQUACY Are all GOALS OF MISBEHAVIOR.......which GOAL is missing (PG 12)
What is REVENGE
500
List 2 CHARACTERISTICS you APPRECIATE about someone you ADMIRE
OPEN ANSWER
500
Give 4 encouraging words/statements............... (PG 68)
OPEN ANSWER I enjoy your humor I trust your judgement You worked hard on that Thanks. That was a big help
500
Give 3 examples of what you would do during a "DIRTY FIGHT" and give 3 examples of what you would do during a "CLEAN FIGHT"
DIRTY: NOT LISTEN, CHANGE SUBJECT, BRING OTHERS IN, SARCASM, YELL, NAME CALL, LEAVE THE DISCUSSION AND DON'T PLAN ANOTHER TIME, YOU ALWAYS CLEAN: RESPECTFUL, NO YELLING, I MESSAGES, NO SIDE TRACKING, DEAL ONLY WITH PRESENT PROBLEM, DO NOT LEAVE WITHOUT PLANNING A TIME TO GET BACK TO IT
500
There are 4 STEPS in setting CONSEQUENCES 1) IDENTIFY THE GOAL 2) 3) OFFER CHOICES 4) FOLLOW THROUGH What is STEP 2 (PG 97-98)
What is DECIDE WHO OWNS THE PROBLEM