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100

CHARMING PRINCE WAKES MISSING PRINCESS WITH A KISS

Love at first sight or invasion of personal space?

Sleeping Beauty

'Sleeping Beauty' is regarded as one of the great masterpieces of animation, and one of the crown jewels of Walt Disney Animation. Many cite it as some of the most beautiful animated images ever captured on film, a level of graphic sophistication and beauty that has never been matched since. 


100

Wanted - Gently used furniture; not too big, not too small but just right.

Goldilocks and the Three Bears

The original version of the tale tells of an impudent old woman who enters the forest home of three bachelor bears while they are away. She eats some of their porridge, sits down on one of their chairs, breaks it, and sleeps in one of their beds. When the bears return and discover her, she wakes up, jumps out of the window, and is never seen again.

100

Ding-dong! The wicked witch is dead. It seems a house has fallen on her head. Her sister vows the solution to her untimely death be retribution. BUT which old witch is which? One hails from where the sun rises: one from where it sets. Which old witch is dead? It's time to place your bets!

Wicked Witch of the East

In the movie, Dorothy is gifted the Wicked Witch of the East's slippers from Glinda, the Good Witch of the North, to keep them safe from the Wicked Witch of the West and to help her return home to Kansas

100

Nottingham has an archery competition that'll change your life,

If you win the whole thing, you'll take Maid Marion as your wife!

But look! Here comes our hero to compete and didn't you know that his best talent after robbing is his aiming with his bow!

Robin Hood

Robin Hood may have been a job description not a name. In some medieval dialects Hood and Wood are pronounced the same. And Robert, pronounced in a French accent could be Robber. So Robin Hood might simply be the Robber of the Woods.

100

I've got no strings
To hold me down
To make me fret
Or make me frown
I had strings
But now I'm free
There are no strings on me

Pinnochio


200

ALLEGED ARSONIST DIES - ACCIDENTAL DEATH or MURDER?

Dorothy Gale remains in custody for questioning regarding the death of a well known wicked witch. Gale claims said witch intentionally set her scarecrow friend on fire. Gale threw a bucket of water over the scarecrow which also drenched the wicked witch and led to her demise. Witnesses were horrified by her last words "I'm melting! I'm melting!" Could it all have been avoided if the scarecrow only had a brain and got out of the line of fire?

Wicked Witch of the West

Margaret Hamilton played the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz. She later appeared on Mister Rogers' Neighborhood to reassure children that the Wicked Witch was just pretend. 

200

NOW HIRING!!!

Off to work you go! Work crew required for general labor. Uniforms provided (XS only). Must be able to whistle while you work. Seven positions available.

The Seven Dwarves

The dwarfs did not have names until the story was brought to Broadway in 1912 and then they were called Blick, Flick, Glick, Snick, Plick, Whick and Quee.

What are the names now? 

200

*Retraction*

To whom it may concern, it has come to pass that the passing of Aurora Briar Rose has not, indeed, passed. It was just a bad apple.

Snow White

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was the first feature-length animated film in U.S. history and the first animated feature to be selected for the National Film Registry which annually recognizes twenty-five films from the United States based on their cultural, historical, or aesthetic significance.

200

Never has there been such a curious croquet-ground; it was all ridges and furrows; the balls were live hedgehogs, the mallets live flamingoes, and the playing card soldiers had to double themselves up and to stand on their hands and feet, to make the arches.

Alice in Wonderland

Contrary to most films and illustrations, Alice is probably a brunette. Carroll based his book character on the real-life Alice Liddell, the young daughter of a family friend who most definitely had brown hair as seen in the photograph.

200

You got some power in your corner now
Some heavy ammunition in your camp
You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how
See all you gotta do is rub that lamp                 

Have a wish or two or three
I'm on the job, you big nabob
You ain't never had a friend like me

Alladin - based on Arabian Nights


300

CHARGES PENDING IN ALLEGED PERSONAL INJURY SUIT AGAINST ROYAL B&B

Princess claims Queen's tampering with bedding left her battered and bruised.

Princess & the Pea

She's been charged with disturbing the peas.

300

PERSONAL ADS

If you lost a see through stilletto as you ran to your carriage from my royal discotecho
your hand must I have in marriage.
If you escaped before midnight
under the light of the moon
then you're the love that I've looked for
be my baby, my belle and my boon

Cinderella

The fairy godmother magically created the glass slippers onto Cinderella's feet. While everything else reverts to its original form at the stroke of midnight, the glass slippers remain unchanged because they are made of pure magic.

300

Fee-fi-fo-fum, he can't smell the blood of an Englishman

For the giant has fallen from a horrifying height no longer to give this boy a terrifying fright

Jack & the Beanstalk

According to researchers, the story of Jack and the Beanstalk originated more than 5,000 years ago, based on an archaic story form now known as The Boy Who Stole Ogre's Treasure. The modern version we know as Jack and the Beanstalk first appeared as The Story of Jack Spriggins and the Enchanted Bean in 1734.

300

Bridge Dash Race Coming Soon!

Get over the bridge to get to the knoll with the sweet green grass without being ate by a troll.

Billy Goats Gruff

The story was translated into English from 1859 Popular Tales from the Norse. A word describing the tuft of hair on a goat's head was translated into the goat's family name as “Gruff”.

300

Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn away and slam the door
I don't care what they're going to say
Let the storm rage on
The cold never bothered me anyway

Frozen  - Based on The Snow Queen


400

WEE ONE DIES AFTER SPIDER ATTACK

Tiny boy miraculously survives being swallowed by a cow, escaping a giant's clutches, and even being baked in a cake, but ultimately dies after being attacked by a large spider.

Tom Thumb

While the fairy tale is a fictional story, there was a real-life person named Charles Sherwood Stratton, a dwarf who became famous as "Tom Thumb" and was a performer in P.T. Barnum's circus. 

400

FOR RENT

Three bedroom brick house. A wolf can huff and puff and not blow the house down but damage deposit and insurance are required.

The Three Little Pigs

Did you know the Three Pigs started a rock band? Their first concert brought down the house!

400

Candy House Live Cremation Services 

Dispose of unloved ones discreetly and affordably (chocolate coins preferred). 

Family owned and operated by these two siblings.

Hansel & Gretl

Hansel and Gretel's trail of breadcrumbs inspired the name for the navigation element breadcrumbs that allows computer users to keep track of their locations within programs or documents.

400

New Hair Climbing Centre Opens!

Programs available include:

 Tresses for Tots - for the wee ones!

 Braided Bungee Jumping - for the brave ones!

 Mullets & Mountain Climbers - for the macho!

Tangles to Tango - for the couples!

Rapunzel

The tower Rapunzel was trapped in was 70-feet tall her hair was at least 70-feet long and would weigh 20 pounds!!

400

What would I give if I could live out of these waters?
What would I pay to spend a day warm on the sand?
Bet'cha on land they understand
Bet they don't reprimand their daughters
Bright young women, sick of swimmin'
Ready to stand

The Little Mermaid based on HCA's the Little Mermaid


500

PRECIOUS METAL MARKET CRASHES!!!

Funny little man with a funny little name can spin straw into gold!

Rumplestiltskin


500

For sale - used royalty robes. Like NEW condition. Worn only once but never to be seen.

The Emporer's New Clothes


500

Oh, Grandmother, but what a big coffin you have!

The better to be buried in my dear!

Red Riding Hood

Did you hear about the cow that cried wolf?

It was fake Moos.

500

The Survivors of Hans Christian Anderson Stories hosts the Dance 'Til You Drop Fundraiser

(No shoes of this color allowed!)

Red

The Red Shoes ballet based on Hans Christian Anderson's tale received critical acclaim with a total of five Academy Award nominations, including a win for Best Original Score and Best Art Direction. 


500

They can sing, they can dance
After all, miss, this is France
And a dinner here is never second best
Go on, unfold your menu
Take a glance and then you'll be our guest
Oui, our guest, be our guest  

Beauty & the Beast based on La Belle et la Bete, by Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve, published in 1740.