When we believe everything is only “good” or “bad”. No Gray Areas.
What is Black or White Thinking/All or Nothing (Setting the bar too high)
Exaggerating a mistake, or a negative quality in yourself.
What is Magnification?
Believing that if you feel something, it must be true.
What are Feelings as Facts/Emotional Reasoning ?
Jason asked me to help him out at the art fair; I said yes, but I really don't have time.
Cindy asked me to make cookies for the church. I agreed, but now I regret it.
What is People Pleasing?
I should always be happy. I should never be sad.
I should go to the gym 4 times a week.
What are Should Statements?
Having a negative belief about yourself and thinking it applies to everything you do.
What is Negative Labeling?
Making predictions about what is going to happen in the future. Thinking you know what will happen in the future, and that it will be bad!
What is Fortune Telling?
AKA: Jumping to Conclusions
Seeing your strengths and achievements as small or unimportant.
What is Minimization?
I feel ugly, so I must be ugly.
I feel like a bad friend, so I must be a bad friend.
If I don't get an A on every test, I'm not smart.
I have to win every tennis match, otherwise I'm worthless.
What is Black & White Thinking/All-or-Nothing
AKA: Setting the Bar Too High
Believing things have to be a certain way.
Focusing on how you believe things 'should' or 'must be', rather than how it is.
What are 'Should' Statements?
You must please or impress others to maintain your value as a person or to keep from being devalued as a person
What is People Pleasing?
Blaming yourself unnecessarily for external negative events, even when you may only be partly responsible or not responsible at all.
What is Personalization/Self-Blaming?
Similar to Blaming, but blaming yourself.
I deserve more than others.
I am more important than you.'
What is Entitement?
They looked at their watch while I was talking, they must think I'm really boring.
Emma didn't invite me to her party. I bet she doesn't like me.
This is the opposite of personalization. Taking zero responsibility for your role in a situation, putting all blame on someone or something else.
What is Blaming Others?
Taking a single negative event, and assigning it to all current or future situations.
E.g., 'I always make mistakes.''You never listen to me!'
What is Overgeneralization
You pay more attentiong to bad things and ignore when something good happens.
What is Ignoring the Good/Disqualifying the Positive?
AKA: MENTAL FILTER
My husband/wife looks sad, are they mad at me?
I made a mistake in my wrestling match, now my team lost the chance to get to the championship match.
What is Personalization/Self-Blaming?
I'm so stupid. Everything I say is dumb.
You're so lazy.
What is Negative Labeling?
Believing that the worst possible outcome will happen, and thinking it's the only outcome.
What Catastrophizing/Blowing Things Up
Similar to Magnification
Assuming you know what someone is thinking.
What is Mind Reading?
AKA: Jumping to Conclusions
Belief that one is deserving or entitled to certain privledges.
What is Entitlement?
You get one answer wrong on a long test, and all you can think about is the mistake.
You score 2 goals in your soccer game, but all you can think about is the shot you missed
What is Ignoring the Good/Disqualifying the positives?
You get a stain on your new shoes and you think they're ruined and can'be be worn anymore.
If I fail this test, then I will never get a job and become homeless.
What is Catastrophizing/Blowing Things Up?