Unhelpful Thinking Traps (part 1)
This is when you pay more attention to bad things, and ignore when something good happens.
- You get one answer wrong on a long test, and all you can think about is that one mistake you made.
- You score two goals in a soccer game, but you keep focusing on that one shot you missed.
What is Ignoring the Good
This is when we think that we must be perfect in everything we do, otherwise we're no good.
"If I don't get an A on every test, I'm not smart."
" I have to win every tennis match I play, otherwise I'm worthless."
What is Setting the Bar too High
I'm never going to have enough time to finish this assignment. I will never get into a good college and I'm going to become homeless!
What evidence do you have that you won't finish the assignment, and that if you don't, that you will become homeless?
How likely is this really?
Is there something else that could happen instead?
"Ugh, this is the worst day ever!! This week is going to to be the worst!"
Examples: "Today was a hard day."
"This morning was rough, but I still have the rest of the day to turn it around!"
"Wow, today was really hard. Tomorrow is a new day."
What is anxiety?
What is: the experience of feeling worried, nervous, scared, or afraid - it is the opposite of relaxed.
This is when we make a really big deal out of something small, or make something a little bit bad seem like the worst thing ever.
- I get a stain on my new shoes and I think they're ruined and can't be worn anymore.
- I say "My life is horrible! I'm not allowed to see my friends on Friday!"What is Blowing Things Up
This is when we believe that if we feel something, it must be true.
"I feel like I'm a bad friend, so I must be a bad friend."
What is Feelings as Facts.
Remember--just because you feel it, doesn't mean it's a fact!
Sarah didn't invite me to her birthday party. I bet it's because she thinks I am weird.
What evidence do you have that this is true?
Could there be another reason she didn't invite you?Is there something else she could be thinking?
"People should always be nice to me."
Examples: "I want people to be nice to me"
"I will do my best to surround myself with people who are nice and care about me"
"Not everyone is going to like me - and that's okay!"
What are common physical (body) symptoms of anxiety?
What is: rapid heart rate, shallow breathing, muscle tension, sweating, difficulty swallowing, dizziness, stomachaches, shaking
This is when we think we know what will happen in the future, and we predict that it will be bad.
- "I bet no one will come to my birthday party."- "I just know that I'm not going to have fun if I go."
What is Fortune Telling.
This is when we believe things have to be a certain way.
"People should always be nice to me.""I should always be happy. I should never be sad."
What is "Should Statements"
My parents are arguing; it is most likely my fault.
What evidence do you have that they are arguing because of you?
Could there be another explanation?He didn't say "Hi" to me this morning, so he must be mad at me for something I did.
Examples: "There are many reasons why he did not say 'Hi' to me. It's probably not personal."
"I will check in with him later and make sure everything is ok"
What are 5 coping skills you can do to calm your body and mind?
What are: deep breathing, body squeezing exercises, picturing your safe place or a peaceful memory, writing in your diary, drawing, going on a walk, playing with slime, talking to a parent or friend, taking a bath, listening to music, meditation, positive self-talk, talking back to your anxiety, etc!
This is when we believe we know what someone else is thinking, or why they are doing something, without having enough information.
- "People are looking at me. They must think my shirt is ugly."
- "Emma didn't invite me to her party. I bet she thinks I'm weird."
What is Mind Reading.
This is when we blame ourselves for anything that goes wrong around us, even if we have nothing or little to do with it.
- My basketball team lost a game: "It's all my fault!"- Your friend is sad today: "I probably did something to upset her."
What is Self-blaming
I know she complimented me on my new outfit, but she was just being nice.
How do you know this is true?
Are you ignoring the good?
"I feel anxious, so something must be wrong!"
Examples: "I am feeling anxious."
"I feel anxious. I am uncomfortable and nervous, but I can handle it."
"I am feel anxious. It is my choice what I do with my anxiety. Let me start by calming my breath."
Anxiety happens when a part of our brain called the ________ senses danger (even when there isn't one) and sends signals to the rest of the body to prepare for the possible danger.
What is: Amygdala
This is when we have a negative belief about ourselves and think it applies to everything we do.
"I'm a loser so my artwork stinks."
"I'm so stupid. Everything I say is dumb."
What is Negative Labeling.
How big of a problem is this really? On a scale of 1-10 (1 being very small and 20 being huge), how big is this problem you are facing?
How much will this really matter in a day, a week, a month?
How can you cope with it?
"I will never be happy"
Examples: "I may be unhappy now but that will pass." "I have been happy before and I will be happy again."
True or False: There are benefits to anxiety and stress.
What is: True! Name some reasons why we need anxiety/stress in our lives.