Have you been listening?
What are some protective factors out of your control?
family, neighborhood you grew up in and genetics
Scenario: A friend asks to borrow your car. This will be a big inconvenience for you.
Give an aggressive response
No way! Why would I let you borrow my car? You’re crazy to even ask.
When are attachment styles created?
Attachment styles are established in childhood and strongly impact romantic relationships throughout life.
Protective factors are..
things that contribute to mental health, and allow a person to be resilient in the face of challenges.
Urge surfing is a technique for __________
managing unwanted behaviors.
Practicing gratitude releases what chemicals?
serotonin and dopamine
What type of communication does the person prioritize others?
Passive
What tells you someone has an Avoidant attachment style?
overly rigid, guarded, and distant
uncomfortable with emotions and conflict
difficulty expressing needs and wants
When you are "allowing" what are you doing?
Observe your experience as if watching a movie. Let your thoughts, feelings, and sensations come and go as they are. Let go of any judgment—it is okay to feel however you are feeling. You may tell yourself, “This is how it is right now.”
What are two things urge surfing can be helpful for?
Anxiety
Depression
Craving/Substance Abuse
Anger
For the "N" part of RAIN, what is an example of a comforting message you can give yourself?
Give yourself a comforting message, such as “I love you,” “you are okay,” or anything else you need.
Scenario: Your boss asked you to stay late, while everyone else leaves. You always stay late, and tonight you have plans.
Please give an assertive response
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What tells you someone has Anxious-Avoidant attachment?
tendency toward emotional extremes
difficulty maintaining healthy boundaries
prone to high-conflict relationships
Alternates between anxious and avoidant attachment. Simultaneously desires and distrusts intimacy with their partner, resulting in contradictory, inconsistent behavior.
What protective factor do these fall under?
-Meaningful involvement in work, education or other roles
-understanding of personal values and living in accordance with those values
Sense of purpose
What are 2 other skills to use in addition to urge surfing?
Managing triggers (using coping skills) and delay and distraction
What are 3 benefits to practicing gratitude?
Reduces aggression and enhances empathy
Improves quality of sleep
You cope better in tough and difficult times
You have a better relationship with your friends and family
Decreases pain
Improves physical health
Improves self esteem and confidence
Name 3 traits of aggressive communication
easily frustrated, speaks loud or overbearingly, unwilling to compromise, use of criticism/humiliation and domination, frequently interrupts or does not listen, and disrespectful towards others.
What tells you someone has a Secure attachment style?
committed to relationship, but independent
attentive, affectionate, and accepting
able to handle and resolve conflict
What does RAIN stand for?
Recognize, Allow, Investigate, Nurture
Explain how to practice urge surfing (3 steps)
Acknowledge the urge
Notice your thoughts and feelings without trying to change or suppress them
Remind yourself- its okay/natural, not a must, some discomfort is okay, urge is temporary
What are 4 traits of assertive communication?
· Listens without interruption
· Clearly states needs and wants
· Willing to compromise
· Stands up for own rights
· Confident tone / body language
· Good eye contact
What are the 3 types of communication?
Passive, Aggressive, Assertive
What are the 4 attachment styles
Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, Anxious-Avoidant(Disorganized)
What are the 6 protective factors we discussed?
social support, coping skills, physical health, sense of purpose, self-esteem, and healthy thinking
What are the 4 stages of urge surfing?
trigger, rise, peak, fall