Problem Solving
What is the first thing you need to do when following the problem solving steps?
Define the problem
-When and where does the problem occur?
-What are the causes of the problem?
What is the DEARMAN skill for?
Objective effectiveness. DEARMAN helps us ask for things we want, set boundaries and say no to things we don't want, and gives us a template to ensure our goal going into a conversation is met.
When ___ grows up, they want to be a plumber.
Nate!
What is the goal of the self-soothe skill?
To calm ourselves down when we are feeling emotionally overwhelmed
What does 'distress tolerance' mean? What is an example of a skill we can use to tolerate distress?
Distress tolerance is our ability to handle uncomfortable emotions (anger, guilt, sadness, etc) in a safe and productive way. Skill like ACCEPTS, IMPROVE, TIPP, grounding, and self-soothe are all distress tolerance skills.
What is the second step to follow when problem solving?
Develop multiple solutions
-Brainstorm and write about at least 3 potential solutions to the problem
What does the E step in DEARMAN stand for?
For an extra 50 points, can you give an example of a statement that could be used in this step?
Express: How do we feel about the situation we are discussing? We can use 'I feel' statements to help us with this.
'I feel (emotion) when (situation) because (interpretation)'
Example: I feel angry when you don't call me when you said you would because it makes me feel forgotten
What is one thing each member of your group could do in the moment to practice self-soothe?
Answers may vary. Examples include chewing gum, stretching, taking a warm shower or bath, burn scented candles, walk outdoors, cook or bake, listen to quiet music, etc.
I'm feeling really depressed at home today. What is a skill I can use?
Answers may vary! Using communication skills to talk about our feelings, behavioral activation or opposite action to get us active, and distress tolerance skills like self-soothe and ACCEPTS can all help us manage our emotions.
What is the third step to follow when problem solving?
Assess your solutions and choose one
-Start by getting rid of any brainstormed solutions that are unrealistic or impractical
-Write about the pros and cons of each solution, keeping in mind short-term versus long-term solutions, how realistic the solution is, and how it will affect others, as well as how it will affect us.
What does the GIVE skill help us with?
Relationship effectiveness. GIVE allows us to build relationships with others and provide them space to feel heard, respected, and validated in the conversation.
A hobby ___ enjoys is playing Sims.
Aidan!
Have everyone in the group share a specific emotion and situation that they can plan to use self-soothe to help manage in the future.
Answers may vary
I am feeling really angry and aggressive. What is a skill I can use?
Answers may vary: Self-soothe, TIPP skills like intensive exercise and more can all be helpful!
What is the fourth step to follow when problem solving?
Implement your solution
-Outline the specific steps you will take to put your solution into action. When, where, and how will you implement this solution?
What does the FAST skill help us with?
Self-respect effectiveness. FAST allows us to feel good about ourselves in a conversation. It helps us stick to our values, stand up for ourselves, and have integrity when communicating with others.
A hidden talent of ____'s is that they can do a good Mickey Mouse impression.
Aryanna!
True or false: Self-soothe should only be used when we are actively in distress.
False! Self-soothe can be practiced daily. When we practice self-soothing on a regular basis, calming ourselves down when we're upset will be much easier.
What is the three good things skills? How can it help us?
Three good things is a gratitude skill that helps us focus on positive moments and things we are grateful for. Negative thinking is a defining feature of depression. Positive experiences are minimized, while negative experiences are magnified. Gratitude helps combat this tendency by shifting focus toward positive experiences, rather than negative ones. We can practice it by writing about or thinking of three positive things from our day.
What is the fifth and final step of problem solving?
Review!
-What went well? What could be improved upon next time? Is there anything you would change about your approach next time?
As a group, brainstorm a DEARMAN script that you could use for the following prompt:
Your friend is not contributing to the group assignment and you're having to make up for their work.
Example: (Answers may vary)
Describe: We have an assignment for class due soon. Your part has not been submitted.
Express: I feel frustrated when you aren't updating your part of the assignment because I have to do extra work, and I don't have the time to.
Assert: I am asking that we come up with a plan to have your portion completed by the end of this week.
Reinforce: Thank you for hearing me out, I'm glad we can work together.
Mindful: (remain on topic and present in the conversation)
Appear confident: (speak with a steady tone of voice, keep good posture, and make eye contact. Fake it 'till you make it!)
Negotiate: I can help re-explain that instructions and send you some of my notes if you can work on your slides each day this week.
____'s favorite place to eat is McDonalds.
Milo!
Lead the group in a self-soothe activity of your choice. Everyone in your group must participate in order to gain points!
Answers can include taking deep breaths, stretching, using the essential oils, playing a relaxing song, etc.
All members in the group need to share a strength of theirs. What are positive qualities of ours, or things that we are good at? All members of the group must answer to gain points!
Answers may vary :)