History
Where was the declaration of independence signed?
At the bottom of the page.
Why is the sky blue?
Because if it were plaid, you'd never stop complaining about the fashion choices of the atmosphere.
A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
9
What note gets the whole measure?
A dotted half note (we're in 3/4)
What was the main outcome of the Cold War?
Two nations spending trillions of dollars to show who had the better, more destructive toys, resulting in the world’s longest, most stressful staring contest.
If a killer whale is a dolphin, why is it called a killer whale?
Because "Extremely Large Ocean Dolphin Known for Murdering Things" didn't fit on the name tag.
What language do British people speak?
Proper British
Why did the Romans build such straight roads?
Because they had a neurotic need to get from A to B as quickly as possible, usually to conquer someone or tax them, with minimal scenic detours.
Do atoms ever actually touch each other?
No. Everything you touch is just electromagnetic repulsion telling you that you can't actually touch anything. You are just hovering, forever.
Why was the Titanic deemed "unsinkable"?
Because nothing says "absolute safety" like building a giant metal ship and daring fate to prove you wrong on its very first voyage.
If there are oxygen molecules in water, why can't we breathe underwater?
Because, believe it or not, your lungs are designed for air, not to act as a fish-gills-impersonator. Try holding your breath instead.
What is 2+2 equal to?
4, VI, 22, and Fish
Why did Napoleon invade Russia in the winter?
Because he clearly thought that marching over a thousand miles into a frozen wasteland, while being chased by a retreating army that burns everything in its path, was a great career move.
Is kryptonite a real chemical element?
Yes, right next to Vibranium and Unobtainium on the "Elements Only Found in Comic Books" table.
Find x: 5x-4
Its to the right of 5.