Healthy Communication
What does healthy communication look like? Name 3.
Summarizing what the other person said
Giving space when needed
Calm tone
"I" statements
Calm body language
Vulnerability
Perspective Taking
Taking accountability
Apologizing with intention
Forgiveness
Name examples of unhealthy body language.
Clenched fists, rolling eyes, invading personal space
Someone keeps interrupting you while telling a story.
Healthy: I feel frustrated when I’m interrupted. Can I finish my story?
Unhealthy: Can you shut up and let me talk for once? You’re so annoying.
Relax, it’s not that serious.
This is an invalidating statement. Consider alternate perspective because what not be important to you could be really important to your peer.
"I can see this is really bothering you. Do you want to talk about it?"
Is yelling healthy or unhealthy communication? Provide an example for whatever your answer is.
Unhealthy communication- when used to get your point across or not considering others feelings, when used to place a label on someone in a form of relatiation or bullying ex. "Loser!" or "You're ugly!"
Healthy- yelling as a form of encouragement or cheering ex. "You got this!"
Name the communication style we should work towards.
+50 if you can explain how this style can improve relationships
Assertive
Use "I statements" to get your feelings across, consider everyone's feelings during the interaction
Name one unhealthy communication style
Aggressive or Passive Aggressive?
A friend keeps making hurtful jokes about you.
Healthy: That hurt my feelings. Please don’t make jokes like that.
Unhealthy: You make a hurtful joke back.
Whatever, I don’t care anymore.
Instead of shutting down, be vulnerable.
Use "I" statements to express how you're feeling!
"It’s okay if we don’t agree. We can still hang out. We all have our own opinions."
Is setting boundaries healthy or unhealthy?
+50 if you can name two boundary styles
Healthy
rigid, porous, healthy
Someone tells you something about another peer meant to be kept private. You then repeat this to another peer. This creates a ripple effect and now the person you guys are speaking about finds out. She feels extremely embarrassed and that boundaries were crossed.
Provide an example of how you might take accountability.
I shouldn’t have repeated what was said to me. I played a part in telling your business to others also, and that wasn’t okay. I'm sorry
A peer verbalizes , "I feel like I've grown a lot since being here." Another peer responds by bringing up the past.
Describe how this can lead to conflict in the situation.
A peer keeps arguing with your favorite staff.
Healthy:
1. I’ve noticed a lot of arguments with staff lately. I’m wondering what’s going on for you, because it’s creating tension on the unit.
2. I'm feeling really anxious hearing you guys argue. Can you please stop?
Unhealthy:
You always have something to complain about for no reason. Everyone knows you’re just disrespectful to staff and want attention.
If you don’t agree with me, don’t hang out with us then.
Avoid manipulation and power dynamics.
"I disagree with something you said. Can we talk about it?"
How can healthy communication create a safer and welcoming environment?
+50 if you can name specific things you can do in your interactions
When people use calm tone and body language, listen and summarize, take accountability, apologize with intention, respect boundaries, and show understanding, it builds trust and makes everyone feel safe, heard, and welcome.
Someone keeps making comments about another peers appearance. Provide a healthy response the peer can make.
I feel uncomfortable when comments are made about my body, and I want that to stop
A disagreement occurs between two peers, and one of the peers tells their friend "you heard her say that didn't you?" The friend responds, "yes, I don't know why you're lying about that."
How might bringing the friend into the disagreement increase conflict?
You make a hurtful comment towards someone during an argument.
Healthy communication: Apologize, saying "I’m sorry for what I said. I was angry, but that doesn’t make it okay."
Unhealthy: I meant what I said, "you're still dumb."
Everyone agrees with me. Nobody wants you around.
Avoid pitting people against each other and intentionally trying to put someone down.
Ask for space if you need it! Friendships have conflict and that's perfectly fine, but how we navigate it is important.
"I’m feeling overwhelmed right now and need some space. Can we talk later?"
"I’m feeling frustrated with something you did, but I want to understand how you’re feeling too."
How can power dynamics create a hostile environment?
+50 if you provide an example of what someone with more power might do/feel
+50 if you provide an example of what someone with more power might do/feel
When one person has more power and misuses it, others feel scared to speak up, which makes the environment tense and unhealthy.
People in power: Might try to intimidate, silence, or control others to maintain the power or authority
Not in power: might feel unsafe, unable to express themselves due to retaliation, make themselves smaller
There is a new peer on the unit. You and this peer have been in a lot of conflict. You’re frustrated because it feels like they have been causing a lot of problems since arriving. Provide an example of how perspective-taking in this situation can help with the relationship.
+50 if you can provide how you might open friendly conversation with this peer
Pause before you react, consider what the peer might be going through, shift blame into understanding, and this can help set a calmer tone in your interactions.
You might open conversation through being vulnerable: "Transitioning here was a lot for me too. I didn’t realize you might be struggling with this also. I was annoyed before, but I understand. I’m open to talking things out."
A peer doesn’t have many friends and wants to fit in. Another peer says they can sit with their group only if they stop talking to someone else on the unit.
Explain what type of unhealthy communication this is and why.
Hint: There is multiple unhealthy communication styles playing a role here.
Manipulation
The peer uses friendship as a reward and pressures someone to change their behavior to be accepted.
Power dynamics
One peer has social power (a group/friends) and uses it to control who the other person can talk to.
Pitting people against the other person
The peer is forcing them to choose sides by saying they can’t talk to someone else if they want to belong.
You're really angry and a friend wants to talk with you.
Healthy: I’m upset right now and need time before we talk.
Unhealthy: You're so annoying, just leave me alone!
Everyone saw you crying after your visit yesterday. You're not really as tough as you make yourself to be.
Avoid bringing up the past, public shaming, putting someone down
"I noticed you seemed upset after your visit. Are you okay?"
"It seems like you’re dealing with a lot, even if you don’t always show it."
If not close with the person, tell a staff to check in on them.
Name one way unhealthy communication can affect relationships.
Break trust, cause conflict, or hurt feelings